Proper parenting matters
PROPER PARENTING makes a significant difference in a child’s life and future as well as in the society and nation. Parenting makes a tremendous difference as many of the challenges in our nation can be traced back to it. We should therefore be deliberate about parenting. Research shows that there are three main approaches to parenting.
EXPERIENTIAL PARENTING
The first is experiential parenting.
This is when our parenting choices are based only on personal experiences. We do what comes naturally, what feels right and what we learned from past mistakes and personal experiences. We experiment, for example, with how our family would do things or try the opposite and see if it works or doesn’t. This is a kind of trial and error, hit or miss approach. There is no broad concrete basis for our actions using this approach except our experience.
CULTURAL PARENTING
Then there’s cultural parenting. This is where we draw influences from societal norms. Society has more influence on us than we realise. Agents like the media, inform us about how we should be, look and feel, and social expectations inform how we should behave. We accede and raise our children based on these norms. The challenge with this approach is that our modern culture tends to be unhealthy for families and children. Families are obviously in disarray, suicide is on the rise along with hopelessness, mental and other health challenges.
BIBLICAL PARENTING
Thirdly,, there is biblical parenting, which involves the application of biblical commands and principles to how we raise our children. In this model of parenting, the Bible provides the perspective that is used to groom our children for adulthood. The Bible is the foundation that informs the principles and guidelines used to raise children. The research has found that children raised in a biblical parenting environment are very different from those who are not.
According to the research these children are:
o Healthier physically and mentally
o Less likely to have depressive symptoms, smoke, use illicit drugs, or have a sexually transmitted infection.
o Happier overall and have a greater sense of well-being because their lives have more meaning and hope.
o More resilient and better able to overcome challenges and setbacks.
o Possessing higher self-esteem and less anxiety.
o Thirty per cent more likely to succeed academically than those from non-religious backgrounds, whether or not they attend Christian schools.
o More satisfied with their lives and have a positive outlook in their 20s.
It seems that God coded His secrets on the pages of His Word and when applied to parenting. It transforms children and impacts them in tremendously positive ways. Chief among these secrets is that a parent’s priority is to gradually transfer a child’s dependence away from the parents until their dependence rests solely on God.
Over the years that our children are in our care, we should be deliberate about helping them transfer their dependence from us and teach them to depend on God. God instructs … “These are the commands, decrees, and laws the Lord your God directed me to teach you to observe 2 … so that you, your children, and their children after them may fear the Lord your God as long as you live by keeping all his decrees and commands that I give you, and so that you may enjoy long life. 3… be careful to obey so that it may go well with you…” Deuteronomy 6:1-3 (NIV).
The Lord is interested in not just us, but also our children being blessed and He gives us the formula for it to happen. He has put within us the power to positively impact this generation and generations to come.