IS SEX BEFORE MARRIAGE A BAD THING?

Dear Pastor,

I come from a small family. My parents have five children, three girls and two boys. My first sister got pregnant when she was 17.

Her boyfriend was 10 years older. She went to live with him when she was 18. When she was 20, she had another child.

Then we found out that this man had another woman and that woman had twins for him.

My sister was disappointed and when I left home for college, she asked my father to accept her back home. My father told her that he did not put her out so she could always come home.

Her children’s father told her that she would have to leave the two children. That caused a big fight between the two of them.

Finally, one day my sister came home with her two children. My parent did not fuss. My father is a farmer. He worked hard to support the household.

Then the church my father attended said he should not have taken her back because that was against the church rules.

My father left the church and everywhere he went Dear R.A.,

I am glad that your father did not listen to his church and that he was willing to welcome home his daughter and grandchildren.

She made mistakes but he forgave her. He showed compassion, but those in the church did not.

There are many people who advocate for sex before marriage. These people are not concerned about having a stable relationship. Many are engaged in casual sex.

Then there are couples who are serious about each other. Their relationship means something. They hope to get married, but they believe that they should engage in premarital sex.

They say that they are not buying ‘puss in bag’. There was a time when only men used to say that, but women often say the same thing.

TESTING THE WATERS

Women say that they don’t know if the men can have an erection, so they have to try them out.

Even Christian women insist that they would not take men as husbands unless they are engaged in premarital sex.

I can only say what the Bible says. The Bible says sex outside of marriage is sin; it calls it fornication he would take his grandchildren with him, and he was not afraid to show them off.

Pastor, here is my problem. I am a professional, and all the men who are interested in me don’t talk about marriage.

Some of them say that they don’t believe in marriage. But the first thing they want from me is sex.

I had a relationship with a doctor and after going out a few times with him, he wanted me to go to bed with him.

I told him that could happen if he would marry me and he said, even if he would marry me, he had to ‘get a sample of me’.

I ended that relationship because after I agreed to have sex with him, he did not want to use the condom and I did not want to get pregnant.

He has tried getting back at me but I am not interested. I told him that as a doctor, I would agree for him to examine me to see if I am a woman or not.

But he was not interested in that. When I started refusing to accept his calls, he told me some dirty bad words in texts. Do you support premarital sex?

R.A.

and it is condemned throughout scripture.

First Corinthians Chapter 6:18-20 says, “Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body. Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body”.

Another passage of scripture says, “Let marriage be held in honour among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous”. (Hebrews 13:4)

Pastor