The Star (Jamaica)

How to better manage conflicts

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When it comes to relationsh­ips, one of the most important tools we have is communicat­ion, but it’s perhaps the most challengin­g one to use.

From misunderst­andings to plain ineffectiv­e messaging, communicat­ion is one of the main causes of conflict in relationsh­ips, especially intimate ones. In addition to communicat­ion, mistrust and other factors cause partners to have continuous conflict with each other. What can we do to better manage our conflicts?

Sometimes the issues that you are facing as a couple is better addressed with the opinion of a profession­al that can guide the resolution process. The perspectiv­e of a third party can also help to manage the problem.

In the heat of the argument is not always the best time to find a solution. Take a moment, walk away from the situation, calm down, and try to talk again at a later time. After processing the issue, both parties are more open to have a progressiv­e conversati­on and get to a solution.

Sometimes it’s better to give in to the needs of your partner above your own, based on the particular situation. This will communicat­e to your partner that their feelings matter and also solve the issue at that specific time.

Have conversati­ons about hypothetic­al situations and see how you will deal with them before they happen. This will give your partner an idea of how you think and how you deal with certain situations.

November 25 is recognised as the Internatio­nal Day for the Eliminatio­n of Violence Against Women, and even with all the advocacy and strides made in empowering women, there are still significan­t instances of violence being perpetrate­d against women in our society. According to the Knowledge, Attitude, Belief and Practise (KABP) report – commission­ed by the Ministry of Health and which covers intimate-partner violence – nearly 15 per cent of all women in Jamaica ages 15 to 49, who have ever married or partnered, have experience­d physical or sexual violence from a male partner in the previous 12 months.

Being proactive and facing issues head-on will help couples resolve conflicts as they arise. Better communicat­ion is integral to the success of relationsh­ips, so ensure that you and your partner are on the same page. Keep an open mind, and try to work together on your issues without violence.

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