Don’t like how my uncle looks at me

Dear Pastor,

I have been reading your column since I was eight years old. Continue to do your good work by helping others. I am now 17. I have a boyfriend who is in his 30s. We had sex.

I protected myself. From about two weeks after we had sex my period came and it has not stopped. I have been bleeding for the past month and a half. Whenever my boyfriend fingers me I bleed. I honestly think something is really wrong with me.

My parents are overseas living with my younger siblings and I am living with my grandparents and an uncle. Whenever I wear shorts in the house I see my uncle looking at me in a ‘different’ way. I try not to focus on that too much. I really do not know what to do. So please tell me what to do. I really need your advice. I can’t talk to any of my relatives because they will tell my parents. I don’t trust not even one of them, and that is the reason I have written to you.

Name withheld

Dear writer,

First of all, you say you are 17 years sold. The only thing that I can commend you for is that you didn’t have unprotected sex with this man. But I cannot not encourage you to continue having sex with him. I am sure that you have told this man about the problem you are experiencing and he has continued to ‘finger’ you. This is not a good man because he should know that from the time you told him that you were bleeding for so many weeks he should have given you money to go to the doctor instead of coming around and playing with your vagina to get his kicks. So please tell this man to get lost and please seek medical attention. Concerning your uncle who is looking at you in a provocative manner,

I do not think you should ignore his behaviour. You should not ignore those looks. If he makes any attempt on you, please report the matter to your grandparents immediately. Do not ignore what I have said in my reply to you, and please write to me again or contact me by phone 876-877-1009.

Pastor