The Star (Jamaica)
This woman is going to nyam mi out!
Dear Pastor, am a 53-year-old man and I am having a problem. I was living with a woman for 10 years. We never got married, but we had a good relationship. We have two children together, and I took her with one. That young man has done well. He had a break and went to America. He got married over there and his mother went to visit him; she then told me she is not coming back.
When I spoke to her son, he said I should have married his mother but I didn’t, and he is planning to give her a better life in America. The two children from our relationship are still with me. I now have a problem because I am in a relationship with another woman. She is 38 years old. No matter what I give to her, she is not satisfied. She always wants more money. I told her to come and live with us so as to cut down on her expenses, so she is here with us, but she is still not satisfied. She always wants money, either to do her nails, her hair, or to buy a new pair of shoes.
When my children’s mother was living here, one chicken would serve all of us for two days. This woman would eat the whole chicken. When I talk to her, she says I am mean and she can’t deal with a mean man. She told my children that I am mean, and they had to stand up for me. I don’t know what to do. I give her money to go to the supermarket every week, but she would turn around and ask me for an allowance.
Every day she says that she is looking for a job. She goes out and when she comes home and I asked her how it went, she says the men who interviewed her don’t want to work with any female boss. I know I did not cause my children’s mother to leave me. I will do anything to get her back. She is even sending money for the children, and she calls me every week. I told this woman that I have here that she has to leave, but she said that I can’t get her out.
She doesn’t realise who she is playing with. I can get her out, but I may get myself into trouble. Please, give me your advice and print it in THE STAR so that she can see it.
IDear B.J., I hope that you would not get physical and abuse this woman. You are eager to have her leave, but go through the right channel. Your children’s mother left and you met this woman, but you did not get to know her well before you invited her to live with you.
Perhaps she can be described as a gold-digger. She is not living with you because she loves you; she is trying to get what she can. Now that she is living with you, she doesn’t have to pay rent or electricity or any other bill. You are going to have to get her out of your house. You may need the help of a lawyer. You should try and protect what is in your house because this woman, when she is leaving, may clean out your house by taking away furniture and other items.
I can understand how you feel now that you have lost your children’s mother. Her eldest child told you the truth when he said you should have married his mother long ago. You took her for granted, and now her son is determined to give her a better life in America. You have only yourself to blame.
Again, I say that you must get this woman out of the house and out of your life. Make sure you don’t hit her. She must be a very big eater if she can eat one chicken and not let it serve a household of four for more than one meal. I am afraid this woman is going to nyam yuh out. I wish you well.