I can’t get over my babyfather
Dear Pastor,
I am 24 years old and I have what I would call a nagging problem. When I was 18 years old, I fell in love with a man. He encouraged me to go on the ‘Pill’, which I did, but I did not follow the instructions very well. There are days where I did not take it, and so I got pregnant and ended up giving birth to a boy child.
This man is five years older than me. He took care of me and the child. My parents told me that they weren’t responsible for me anymore, because I was a big woman, and it is only big woman who go and get pregnant. At the same time they loved my son’s father. One day, my son’s father and I had an argument and I said something I should not have said. I cursed a bad word and he told me I should apologise, but I refused. From that day he was a changed person. He started to pull away from me, and I later found out that he was seeing another girl. I saw the girl’s number in his phone and I called her, and she confirmed that they were friends. She told him that I had called her. He did not like what I did but he kept supporting his child, and gave me anything I asked him for.
He got married to the girl but did not tell me that he was going to do so. When I found out, I cried and I could not eat for days. He went to America for a few months and he called every week to find out how his son was doing. I told him his son was doing well, but I was not well. When he asked me what was wrong, I told him that I still loved him. He told me to get over it.
A GOOD MAN IS HARD TO FIND
My mother told me I was foolish to let this man slip through my fingers because good men are hard to find. I became involved with another guy, but he cannot walk in my son’s father shoes. He tried his best to please me, but I can’t get over my son’s father. My son has his father’s number, so he calls him every day. When I have a chance to talk to him I always tell him that I am not good enough, I want him back. He told me recently that he is now going to church, so he is not going to leave his wife and come back to me. That night I felt like killing myself. How could a man be so heartless and unforgiving?
Pastor, a few nights ago I went to bed and I dreamt that my child’s father was in bed with me and we were having our time together. This was so real, when I jumped out of my sleep I found myself totally wet down there. I had the strongest orgasm. I called him and told him what had happened to me. He said that I should get married to my new boyfriend and he would take care of that. I really don’t know what to do and that is why I am writing to you for your advice. I hope to hear from you soon.
N.C