Thinks he’s too young

Dear Pastor,

I am 27 years old and I have one child for my boyfriend. The baby is very young. My boyfriend and I are working. He works with his father and I am employed by the government.

Both of us are graduates of The University of the West Indies. When I became pregnant, he asked my father if he had any objections for the both of us to live together. His father told him that he wouldn’t object to that because his mother and himself lived together for three years before they got married. He even gave us the security deposit for the place we were going to rent. So, we rented a two-bedroom place and my mother bought us a crib for the baby.

I AM SHOCKED

We thought that everything was going well. But when my fiancé told his mother that he wanted to marry me, she told him that he was too young to get married. My boyfriend is not too young. My mother got married when she was 20. My fiancé is 27 like me. The impression that I get from my fiancé is that his mother feels that that he would be giving me too much money and he would not be able to give her the amount she should get.

I am so shocked to know that she would object to our marriage, but she tells me how much she loves me and she loves the baby. I can’t understand why she would object to us getting married. We plan to have two more children after we are married. His father told us that we should ignore what is wife is saying and he will do what he can to give us a start. He has bought another piece of land in St Andrew. My fiancé does not like the land because it would cost too much to build on it. But I love it because it has a beautiful scenery. But if his father gives it to us, we will take it.

We would like to get married in June 2023. Wish us well, Pastor.

T.S.

Dear T.S.,

There are some mothersin-law who do not encourage their sons to get married too soon because they think that their sons will ignore them after they are married.

Your fiancé’s father understands his wife. He will encourage this man and you to get married and he has promised to help you. He is a good father-in-law. I don’t mean to imply that your future mother-in-law is not a good woman. She is, however, uninformed and she ought to know that you will not hinder her from getting help from her son. So, don’t hold what she says against her. Show her lots of love and respect. I am sure that your fiancé will be happy to see the way you have reacted to her. Stay strong and take good care of yourself.

Pastor