Toh Su Quinn with Chad and Casper Teh T

hey say that motherhood changes everything. From the moment she is told she is expecting, a woman’s life ceases to be her own in its entirety. Her body slowly stretches to unimaginable limits, while hormones fluctuate. And with oestrogens to blame, emotions begin to swing high and low and then upside down like a wild roller-coaster ride spinning out of control. “And don’t get me started on the pain of breastfeeding and mastitis,” Toh Su Quinn quips. Make no mistake—the young mother who recently ushered in the eleventh month since the birth of her twin sons is relishing her new calling, but she is conscious to not paint a rosy picture of it all. In the age of Instagram, it is already easy enough to fall prey to the delusion of aspirational motherhood: one made up of a slew of designer baby strollers, sun-drenched homes, beatific mothers and their equally beloved children. Su Quinn could have played the perfect Insta-mum too, if she chose to—with her slenderlender postpartum frame and her dwelling akin to somethingsom straight out of Pinterest. As we coo overove how dreamy Casper and Chad’s nursery is—a credit to Su Quinn, who sometimes decorates interiors as a hobby— she is quick to emphasiseemphasis the importance of asking for help when needed.neede It is something many modern women do not ddo enough of. “I remember that the first three months after the babies’ arrival were especially tough, as my husband and I tried to adapt ourselves into a family of four. We’re lucky to have sufficient help from the midwife, friends and cousins to get us through it,” she shares with a sense of gratitude. A good network of support in the household has allowed her to take better care of herself, which is sometimes not credited in the highly stylised Instagramworthy moments that most put up. Also left out of the frame are the stresses of parenting duties as the couple try to find a middle ground between their sometimes differing parenting approaches, all the while carefully treading through the twin’s erratic schedule and demands. “Occasionally we find ourselves at odds with disciplining the twins, because I’m more relenting, while (husband) Lip Jin is sterner even if it means leaving the twins screaming for half an hour for their ipads. At the end of the day, we make sure to always stand by the same principles which takes us back on the same page. It is definitely a team effort.” But even in the most chaotic and worn out moments, Su Quinn continues to count her blessings—for those times the boys taught her about patience, the adorable smile on their little faces, and the opportunity to grow as a family. As she has learned that, while it may not always be pretty, the rite of passage as a mother is surely a beautiful one.