Get your priorities right
Life isn’t about showing off your belongings, no matter how big or small
SOME weeks back, I came to know of an unpleasant situation that an acquaintance of mine had landed herself in. I never meant to bring this issue up, but I have come to realise that many out there are going in the wrong direction when it comes to this, and it needs to be discussed before more people end up in a place they wished they weren’t in.
You see, this acquaintance of mine has been going around borrowing money from all her friends and colleagues. The amount involved at any given time was anywhere between RM50 and RM5,000, depending on how much money her friends could afford to spare. She claims to have need for the money to survive, as she has a child to support.
However, the moment she manages to get some cash in her hands, she goes shopping or splurging at expensive eateries. No one would know that, of course, if she hadn’t made it a habit to post about her activities on social media. Thus far, she has amassed a huge amount of debt, and she is only borrowing from more people in order to keep up with her lavish lifestyle.
Unfortunately, this isn’t the first time that I’ve come across a situation like this. In the past, I knew of another acquaintance who took up credit cards in order to spend money on his car. He would squander thousands of ringgit on purchasing accessories for his expensive four-wheeler.
He had bills to pay and a career to build, but none of that mattered to him. He had more interest in purchasing unnecessary rubbish for his car, knowing full well that he had no savings whatsoever.
Why? I’ve been trying really hard to wrap my head around this, but I simply cannot.
Why does it seem so important to focus on insignificant, materialistic things instead of what matters the most? Life isn’t about showing off your belongings, no matter how big or small.
Perhaps it’s the kick one gets when one says, “Look at this. It’s all mine.” Perhaps it’s the little ego boost when one shows the world what one can afford to have.
Perhaps it’s the twisted sense of accomplishment when one can prove to everyone else that one is capable of purchasing anything one wants.
It is not right, and it is certainly not respectable.
How does it make sense to be throwing money on a car, when you should be thinking about how to purchase a home?
How does it make sense to be spending on Starbucks, lobsters and the like every day, when you should be thinking about how to keep some savings for a rainy day?
How does it make sense to be borrowing money from every person you know, just so you can post pictures of your fancy lunch and weekend getaways at swanky resorts?
To the ones who are guilty of doing this, I suggest that you start getting your priorities right. If you possess this sick need to prove to everyone how prosperous you are in order to be accepted, let me tell you something: you’re in the wrong crowd. Real friends do not care much for what you lack — they would accept you and all your flaws without prejudice or bias.
If nothing else matters to you, the least you could do is to think about your family.
If your parents were to hear of what you’ve been doing, wouldn’t they be disappointed? If you have a child, think about what you’re teaching him or her.
Wouldn’t your behaviour lead your child to believe that your act should be condoned and, consequently, arming him or her with negative values?
We are in this world for a reason. We exist for a reason. Now I can’t tell you exactly what that reason is, but I can assure you of one thing: it’s definitely not to be a burden to others and boast about things you don’t even have.
It is high time we acted like responsible adults. We are no longer children trying to gain popularity votes by showing off the only set of expensive stationery at school.
Real friends do not care much for what you lack — they would accept you and all your flaws without prejudice or bias.
The writer, a lecturer at Sunway College, is a Malaysian-born Eurasian with Scottish/Japanese/ Indian lineage. She believes in a tomorrow where there is no racism and hatred