New Straits Times

PEOPLE ENGAGEMENT

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FIND ‘COMMON GROUND’ TO CONNECT

QI find it difficult to get close to people or get them to be close to me, especially those who have different types of personalit­y and background from mine. Is this a common issue or it only happens to few people like me? How can I connect better with people?

ALike you, many people find connecting with strangers difficult. Generally, those who connect well with others are usually those who consciousl­y look for common grounds in them, no matter how different they may be on the surface initially. They can do this because they are curious people who make extra effort to look for cues in their words and behaviours to connect with.

Once you find their ‘hot spots’, leverage on it and make this an opportunit­y to get close to the person.

POWERFUL QUESTIONS

• What can you be curious about people?

• What biases and prejudices you want to be aware of when you are with people?

• What will you look for in them? • What are some heartwarmi­ng words you can use?

STRENGTHEN YOUR INNER SELF

QI like to think that there is good in every one, no matter what our life’s circumstan­ces are. Yet, I am often surrounded by toxic and negative people who have no reservatio­ns about tearing other people’s reputation to pieces. To me, we need to be watchful and not let them pounce on us without our knowledge. Is it fair to say this? A

: Well, it starts with yourself first, whether you have a positive outlook or not. The beauty of life is this, when you are positive you will be surrounded by positive people and not be worried about people taking advantage of you. However, if your outlook is negative, the opposite becomes true. In such a state, you will live very stressfull­y, watching your back all the time. So the choice is yours.

Be positive right from the start — make a conscious effort to surround yourself with positive people to give you positive vibes, while you too learn to be positive with people too; spot and appreciate their goodness. Spirituall­y, take this as your life’s mission that the ‘one above’ wants you to save wretched souls!

POWERFUL QUESTIONS

• How do you interpret the world and people around you?

• To what extent are these positive or negative?

• How can you do more here?

• What will you do from now on?

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