Strengthen your relationship

WHeN something’s new, we tend to have a strong focus. Like buying a gym membership means you start by training every day and really paying attention to your workout.

But when something’s familiar, we sometimes start to slack. With that gym membership you may be cutting corners in the workout after a month or so or maybe skipping exercises completely.

Relationships can be the same. Sometimes we take people for granted and before we know it, we’ve wrecked a loving bond. Here are three simple ideas to keep personal ties strong and loving. 1. Focus on the friendship. Shared interests endure even during times when the gloss of romance is a little thin. Do the things together that you did before you fell in love. Maybe it’s hiking or going to the cinema – whatever it is, make it a feature of your life.

2. Go out of your way to be helpful.

Little things make a huge difference such as picking up her favourite cookies from the bakery and doing the dishes when it’s not your turn. As all those little things add up, they pack a big punch.

3. Celebrate your differences. In romance novels couples often share every sentiment, if not at the start, then certainly at the happy ending. However, being in love and sharing a life doesn’t mean you become each other’s reflections. So enjoy your differences.

4. Agree to disagree. Disagreeing about big issues can mean a break-up but those spats over non-essentials such as whether you mix your light and dark-coloured wash just add pain with little benefit. Do your washing separately and agree to quit scrapping.

5. Say “I love you” every day. For some of us this comes easily but if you’re the type who feels but forgets to say so, make a regular habit of it. Just before bed or as you’re out the door to work are good times.