A second chance
IN her six years as a counsellor at the Sime Darby Medical Centre Subang Jaya’s Cancer & Radiosurgery Centre, Kelly Lai has spoken to and listened to hundreds of cancer patients and survivors.
Most survivors, she shares, still have the fear at the back of their minds that their cancer might return.
“They feel, ‘now I’ve finished my treatment already, but there is no treatment to cure cancer’.
“One patient who just finished his last treatment told me, ‘I don’t know what to do next’, because he feared a relapse.”
Sometimes, this fear is so bad that the survivor develops a phobia about the medical centre.
“When they come back for their follow-up, they feel like they can smell a nasty odour, or they feel sensations related to their previous treatment,” she says.
Other survivors are all right when it comes to visiting the doctor for a follow-up, but the fear of cancer rushes back when they have to go for a screening test, like a CT scan or ultrasound.
“Some can’t sleep a few days before the test, then when it’s done, they want the results as fast as possible.
“Some are so happy when their results are all clear that they hug you,” Lai describes.
But for those who have a relapse, the emotions they go through can be worse than the first time.
“Emotionally, it is more difficult to accept. Usually after treatment, their diet and lifestyle changes.
“They take care of themselves better, so they are more angry when the cancer comes back.
“They repeat their questions, especially ‘why?’, ‘why me?’, ‘why did God let me get this cancer again?’,” she says.
Most survivors, she adds, tend to eat right, exercise, decrease their stress and sleep early.
Some have strict restrictions on their diet, while many become more religious.
Others go back to their normal practices so that they don’t feel like a patient any more, even smoking and drinking. But they usually tend to do so in moderation, says Lai.
“Most patients say it’s a second chance, that’s why they take care of themselves.
“Some also decide to really enjoy themselves – they travel a lot, or if they can afford it, they quit their jobs to be with their children.”
Support is also an important factor for cancer survivors.
“Although family members are the main source of support, they still need other patients or survivors for support, to be friends, to strengthen their mind and spirit,” she says.
She shares that there was one patient who, upon completing her treatment, started distancing herself from her fellow cancer patient friends.
“But she found that her regular friends just couldn’t understand her as well as these friends with cancer, so she rejoined the support group.”
Another survivor who has been clear of cancer for many years still enjoys coming into the centre as she says that her children are all working and she always squabbles with her husband, whereas the staff at the centre always listen to her and treat her like a queen.
Lai always advises cancer survivors to keep busy, with their work or their lives, so that they don’t constantly think about the disease.
She also advises them to surround themselves with family and friends – including those who have gone through the same cancer journey – as the emotional support provided by them is invaluable.