Harassers are everywhere

I WONDER more and more these days where can we look for a sanctuary from the world’s dangers. But I am afraid the answer is that there is none.

I’m sad to say that we need to double up on our defence if we want to avoid ending up a rape victim, especially women. Do take this warning seriously because things have reached a stage where women need to learn martial arts and other self-defence strategies just to walk around safely.

Let me share my story. I knew that rape could and does happen everywhere but I myself was not alert enough of my surroundings one day and almost ended up a victim. I did not see it coming as I was on my university grounds, where I thought I would be safe. Why did the perpetrator target me in the university? And he was a fellow student too.

I remember the incident clearly. I was walking alone by the lake to a group meeting. It was dark as the street lights were dim. Assignments, class presentations, sad life stories - I had everything else on my mind except the thought that I should be cautious of my surroundings. Suddenly a guy who was walking in front of me turned around and saw me. There was no one else around and I had a bad feeling when he began walking towards me. He said “hi” and I said “hi” back. I tried to be positive; we were both on university grounds, surely nothing bad would happen.

I thought the guy was trying to make friends so I made conversation, asking him his name, the course that he was taking and the name of the college he lived in. We talked about Japanese anime because he declared himself an “otaku”, a term, closely equated to the English word “geek”. Things were fine at first but as we walked he turned weird. He uttered “tak tahan” (can’t take it) and “gelap ni” (it’s dark). I was in such a panic that I could not think straight when he touched my waist and left hand. He then tried to cup my face and dirty words came out of his mouth repeatedly.

I did not know what to do and I could not think straight. I wanted to run but I was afraid he would catch up with me. I knew I had to scream but there was nobody around so it was pointless to do so.

My eyes brimmed with tears. I wondered how a male student could do this in the university? I tried to play things cool so that he would not attack me. I said to him, “Calm down. Don’t worry, you’ll be okay.” I could not think of anything better to say.

Just then we reached my group’s meeting point. I was thankful he did not have enough time to do anything to me. I froze when he asked for my number. I gave him a wrong number and quickly walked to the group before he could dial it to make sure that it was my number.

I was so shook-up I skipped the meeting and called a friend to pick me up because I was still traumatised. I called my parents to tell them what happened. I went to the university’s auxiliary police to lodge a report the next day. All I know is that he was called to the offices of the auxiliary police and Student Affairs. I thank God that I have never seen him again after that.

To my fellow women, the possibility of an attack is real, so do not go anywhere alone.

Rapists do not care whether you are fully or perfectly covered because if he sees you, walking alone, he knows that he can take the opportunity to harm you. Be extra careful wherever you go.

The world is getting more and more absurd these days so do not let your guard down.

I tried to be positive; we were both on university grounds, surely nothing bad would happen.

AYUNIE INANIE ARZMI Selangor