A matter of discipline

> Parents need to be tactful when teaching or correcting other people’s children, to avoid causing any misunderstanding

However, there will be some differences between how each family operates, as each has its own rules.

In handling anomalies, you have to be tactful.

For example, your nieces or nephews talk with their mouth full or scream loudly when they play. That could be normal behaviour for them.

Don’t tell them brusquely: “Hey! You’re in MY house. You play by my rules or you’re out!”

Say it sweetly and firmly. If they don’t listen to you, just close one eye and pop a Panadol.

Where safety is concerned, of course, there should be no compromise no matter who those kids belong to.

If you see your friend’s son about to smash a racquet onto your girl’s head, chuck niceties out the window.

Yank the racquet out of the bully’s hand and give him a talking to.

In the situations above, we assume that the other parents are not at the scene. What if they are there, but are not reacting to their children’s actions?

Let’s say a boy is picking up pebbles from the ground and throwing them at other children. His mother sees what he’s doing but she keeps mum.

Would you say: “Boy, don’t throw stones. You will hurt other people.

“And you’re dirtying your hands. There is dog poo, cat pee and bird dropping on the ground. The germs could make you sick.”

You might say: “No way. I mind my own business,” and you move your child a safe distance from the pebble thrower.

On the other hand, if you see it as your moral right to admonish the boy or his mother, do it in a diplomatic manner. Good luck!

Lydia Teh is a mother of four and author of nine books, including the latest, Cow Sense for Young People. Send comments to lifestyle.lydia@ thesundaily.com.