He quickly ran out of money and, as a consequence, began borrowing money, accumulating a debt of over 360,000 all just for drugs

Clifford lists several factors that contributed to him first taking drugs. He was running for the national elections in 2013 when the pressure started to hit. Keeping up appearances and the need to be ‘fake’ were elements of politics that affected Clifford dramatically. There was also the issue of him being gay: he had never come out officially and that weighed on him immensely.

During this time, Clifford was introduced to some bad company who approached him to take drugs – in particular, crack cocaine. He explained how he was in love with the guy who pushed him into drugs and that it was hard to separate this guy’s genuine feelings for him with those of the needs of a drug addict. After his first hit, the addict kept on seeking out Clifford for money and for drugs. He says how powerful ‘crack’ (as it is called) is – after just the first or second time of taking it you are addicted.

Clifford says that, before this experience with drugs, he had never touched a cigarette and barely drank alcohol: but that he “went from nothing to crack”.

And that is how his downward spiral began. He quickly ran out of money and, as a consequence, began borrowing money, accumulating a debt of over €360,000 – all just for drugs.

Clifford lived this life for two years and says that he saw an ‘underworld’ that he never thought existed in Malta. He describes it as being “like a movie” – taking drugs with prostitutes and anyone else who came along. He explains that why you started taking drugs and with whom you take them is irrelevant: “You could be taking drugs with a killer and you wouldn’t care.” This life was a far cry from the one he had before.

He says that “there is no such thing as a first-class addict” when it comes to drugs: everyone is the same and, like every addict, he did everything all the others did.

Eventually, Clifford hit rock bottom. He could not take it anymore and started to remember the better life he had once had. And it was this that pushed him to seek help. He says support from the people around him was also essential in getting such help. Although it was a shock to his parents, they always supported him. Messages from students asking about his situation also triggered a nerve in Clifford, who told himself “I should be setting an example”, which also helped in his recovery.

He first started going to meetings, but he kept relapsing so – with the help of a family friend – he was introduced to the OASI Foundation in Gozo.

And that was the start of the long road to recovery. Clifford spent three months as a full-time resident at OASI where, he says, you learn discipline, how to follow rules, how to respect others and also how to do day-to-day things. Once the programme has been completed, reintegration into ‘normal’ life begins.

Eventually, Clifford got back to his old lifestyle: he became involved in politics and the busy life that comes with it. He says that, in order to remain clean, your life has to change. You can no longer frequent certain places, or even watch certain movies because the temptation is just too much.

The stress – and the wrong environment – made Clifford relapse and this time, he says, he fell even harder: more drugs, more debt and more trouble.

He explains that, in order to enter OASI, you have to have been clean for at least four days – something he could not even manage. So a friend took him abroad for a few days to get him away from temptation and as soon as he stepped on the island, Clifford went straight to OASI. He spent five weeks there, began reintegration once again, and this time it worked. He has now been clean for nearly two years.

He still goes to counselling at OASI but says he is never safe from relapsing. There are, he says, bad days when he gets the urge to take. He points out that drugs are powerful because they make you forget all the bad things you did when you took them and only remind you of the good things. This is why he says it is important to take life day by day and to enjoy the moment. Being clean is a lifestyle commitment.

Clifford has also started a group on Facebook called ‘Addiction Malta’. He says it is a safe platform for drug addicts and ex-drug addicts to talk about their experiences, problems and anything they might need. There are people in the group who have been clean for years – who are an inspiration to others – and also those currently still using who may require help. In October, Clifford will also be releasing a book about his experience.

His final message is that this “can happen to anyone”, regardless of who they are.