The centre of the universe

Last week I met up with an old mentor

Actually my old prof. and someone I’ve always looked up to. He’s got a bit of age to him these days and he is long retired from academia. We started off discussing the state of the nation and all that that entails. I stated the obvious that we Maltese tend to think that we are far more important globally that we have any right to believe. But as I spoke I saw Gianni… that was his name after all… slowly shake his head and smile. I tilted my head to enquire what his opinion happened to be.

He sighed, then said: “You are quite wrong you know.” I bristled: “Oh – and why is that?” Endlessly patient, he replied: “Just look at our position on the map. Geographically we are sited in practically the dead centre of the Mediterranean sea, correct?” “Well yes, like you said, we are… geographically. But so what? That’s just a matter of chance surely.” He shook his head and went on: “Not at all. The fact that we sit slap bang in the middle of the Med means that we are also at the centre of two great cultures – the European and the African.”

Once again I offered the “so what” response. He maintained the patient approach with: “Can’t you see, it is our duty, our prerogative to behave as though we are the centre of the universe, because we bloody well are!”

So next time you switch on the TV and see some jumped-up pontificating politician or priest banging on about Malta and the Maltese as though we are some special and privileged uberspecies of humanity, don’t zapp over to a series concerning a family of midgets on the Family Channel. Stick with Super One and learn all about our inferiority complex that has mutated into some sort of super-superiority complex.

Oh incidentally, my old prof. did admit that he had his tongue firmly in his cheek and was actually joking… Unfortunately a hell of a lot of our fellow countrymen and women are not.

Last Sunday afternoon I was fortunate enough to catch on TV one of the most exciting football matches for a long while. It happened in the English Premier League and was between Newcastle United and Manchester City. The latter named have, over the past few seasons, assumed the mantle of invincibility which was previously the preserve of their rivals across the city Manchester United. Newcastle, on the other hand, have been something of a slumbering giant for far too long.

Anyway last season they finally dispensed with the services of their latest under-achieving manager Steve Bruce and in his stead appointed the comparatively young coach Eddie Howe. In his previous employment Howe had worked something of a footballing miracle by getting perennial strugglers Bournemouth into the Premier League and keeping them there for a few seasons. Anyway, in around eight months, Howe has turned Newcastle from a joke into a team that could be in the frame for honours this or next season.

The game against Manchester City ended in a thrilling three all draw, but Newcastle at one time led three/one. My sympathies have long been with the Italian game, but I tell you, it won’t take too many games like last Sunday’s to convert me to the delights of the EPL.