Emily van Velthooven and dad Paul
“If you’d watched my dad Paul drive the 100 metres from our gate up to the house every evening, you’d think he was the slowest driver in the entire world. But inside that car, we’d unpack the whole day. I’d wait out by the road – you could see him a mile off – and as he turned and slowed, I’d jump into the front passenger seat and start talking about lunch, friends, schoolwork, getting in trouble… Everything! All the way right up to the front door, before we had to scurry inside for dinner.
I didn’t know it at the time, but he was teaching me patience, tolerance, kindness and good listening skills. He also taught me how to drive, actually – tearing up the back paddock in our rusty old Holden ute.
We grew up on a small farm – two girls and two boys. Dad was the shepherd, the head of the flock. Dad wasn’t going to have any black sheep, though. He encouraged all of us to find what we loved and to follow it.
I was 10 when I decided I wanted to be a reporter. A long shot at that age, but he never questioned it. He never doubted it for a moment – even when I doubted myself.
When the tutors at broadcasting school didn’t seem to share my enthusiasm, Dad did. He sent me an email reminding me that my road may be tougher than others, but what doesn’t kill me makes me stronger. I still read that email every week. He taught me perseverance, to be courageous and brave.
Dad’s got his favourite phrases – you know the kind. We’d hear this one on repeat growing up: Underpromise and overdeliver. But his advice was invaluable. It’s helped me navigate growing up, going to university, moving cities and getting my dream job.
When I look around the kitchen table, I am always amazed at how different we all turned out. But thanks to some tough guts and self-belief, courtesy of our dad, I think all our dreams came true. A lawyer, an Olympian, one of New Zealand’s top equestrian riders... and me.
We’ve all had challenges, surprises and doubts, but Dad has always been there, watching, cheering on from the sidelines, in the crowd, on Facetime, at the end of the phone, any time of day or night. He taught me loyalty and, most importantly, love.
He’s still at the other end of the phone most nights, actually. He texts me after my stories go to air. And while he’s taught us lots, I’ve realised there’s one thing I might need to teach him. Dad, if you’re reading this, we’re going to have a lesson on how to use the right emoji.
Emily hosts TVNZ’s coverage of the Tokyo 2020 Paralympic Games on Duke from August 24.
“He’s still at the other end of the phone, texting me after my stories go to air”