The power of an apology

Julie Exline is a Professor of Psychology with a special interest in the virtues of humanity and forgiveness. She found that a sincere apology helps to restore a relationship and wash away resentment and bitterness:

“A powerful apology is admitting responsibility for a mistake, expressing remorse and offering to repair the situation.” According to Stephen G. Post, research shows that true remorse conveys distress, self-awareness and regret. It also elicits empathy from the person who has been hurt. His advice is to always apologise from the heart, with absolute sincerity.

If you are waiting for an apology from someone and it is not coming, try to have compassion and empathy for them. They may be suffering because they are unable to forgive themselves and, as a result, are unable to apologise to you. They may not know how to apologise, or may believe it’s a weakness to do so. Not apologising can often show up their weakness, or expose their fear of failure. Remember, waiting in resentment for an apology that may never come is only hurting you, not them.