Brother: ‘I’m 90% sure Kawhena is not alive’
KELLY MAKIHA
While the nation is in lockdown and families hold their loved ones tight, a Rotorua man is uncertain of his brother’s whereabouts. Paurini Wiringi talks publicly for the first time to
about his missing brother.
Almost every day Paurini Wiringi was with his brother, Kawhena. It’s now been more than four months since he, or anyone else, has seen him.
Paurini says he’s almost certain his brother is no longer alive. But not knowing is agonising.
What also cuts deep is what he feels is a lack of urgency to find him.
While his family tried to raise public awareness and carried out some small searches, there was no heavy police involvement.
Kawhena Wiringi has severe mental illness. Before he went missing, he had stopped taking his medication and was unstable.
Paurini said his brother feared he would be locked up in a mental institution and assumes he decided to run.
Kawhena was last seen on November 15 at his wha¯nau’s Nga¯puna marae. Since then, he hasn’t accessed his phone – he left it behind – or his bank accounts.
His family took to Facebook to try to find him and circulated online fliers but there were no positive leads. The Rotorua Daily Post published articles appealing for the public’s help.
Searches were undertaken by family members around the central city, Nga¯puna, Rotokakahi and
Sulphur Point.
Senior Sergeant Mike Membery of Rotorua police said a missing person’s report was filed by family. He said Kawhena’s photograph was circulated internally so all police knew to keep a lookout for him and members of the homeless community were spoken to as some family members had indicated he associated with them.
Membery said staff who operated the city’s security cameras were alerted to look out for him and police would, in the next few weeks, try to get Kawhena’s case on the television programme Police Ten 7.
When asked why there was no search and rescue operation to look for him, Membery said the case was difficult as there was no start point for the search.
“Where do you start looking? It’s not like previous cases where you had a confirmed last sighting.”
Kawhena’s family did a good job spreading the word on social media in the initial stages of Kawhena’s disappearance, he said.
“Police do feel for families in this situation. It is really difficult when they don’t know where their loved one is. They just want him back either to get him back into their networks or to have closure but we are limited to where we can go with it. Without a digital footprint with phones or bank account, it makes it very hard.”
Paurini said finding a missing person took a group effort.
“It’s not what I want, it’s more what I thought I could expect . . . I’ve given up on police and given up on certain people. A lot of sacrifices have been made to keep things afloat at home.”
Kawhena and Paurini are sons of a solo mother, whose own mental health has deteriorated over the years to the point where she needs round-the-clock wha¯nau care.
Kawhena and Paurini, 32, are only two years apart and as boys were always tight.
They went to Whakarewarewa School but didn’t really make it to high school, dropping out around the age of 13 and 14.
“We were typical brothers; we were always together because there was only us two. For the most part, we were quite tight and that pretty much remained until he went missing. We were together every day.”
Kawhena bounced between living with Paurini and his mother and their aunt across the road, but even if he didn’t stay with them, they would still see each other every day.
One of Kawhena’s greatest talents was art.
Paurini remembers his brother drawing since he was about 3. He would take his pens, pencils and paper everywhere.
“That was his thing and all he ever did. Even if we went out to tangi, he would take it with him.”
“While we were at primary school he was doing graffiti pieces already and it was barely known about in New Zealand at that point.”
As an adult, he was always recognised for his art and while he was mentally well, he was commissioned to do murals and projects and invited to sell his art in galleries.
His artwork can still be seen on Te Ngae Rd, opposite the soccer park, near the cemetery and at a Sunset Rd dairy.
As a known member of the city’s hip hop circle, he was also a talented dancer.
When the boys were teens, their mother’s mental health deteriorated.
“Mum was doing well taking care of two sons by herself and she did an amazing job. But when we went to high school, things started to fall apart . . . It’s difficult to accept you have lost a part of your mother. It is comparable to her being dead.”
On top of that, Kawhena’s mental health was so bad towards the end, he didn’t know who Paurini was.
Kawhena stopped taking his medication and things spiralled out of control. “We tried our hardest to get him to take it. He became very irrational very fast, his physical health was suffering and he was so drained. He didn’t eat well and was chain-smoking. His benefit was cut off because he wouldn’t go and renew it.
“He would walk around Nga¯puna for hours crying, so miserable. He had multiple personalities and one of them was a baby crying and he would walk around the neighbourhood crying and there would be dribble on his top.
“I would have to walk around behind him from a distance. I would do that for hours every day to monitor him.”
Paurini knew the situation had got so bad, he had to get professional help, not only for the safety of Kawhena but also people around him, as he was wandering across roads.
As people came to assess Kawhena, he started to get afraid.
“He couldn’t handle everything that was going on. One day he was feeling so low, he said he doesn’t know what was going on, he was scared and wanted it to end.”
Since Kawhena disappeared, Paurini has struggled financially as he’s not been able to concentrate on work.
“I lost two contracts in November and I’m a bit of a financial mess. In a situation like this, I would have thought there could have been a bit more relief.”
Paurini still struggles with trying to find Kawhena while looking after his mother. “This is the devil of mental illness.”
When asked what his gut feeling was about Kawhena, Paurini said realistically he didn’t think he was still alive but he couldn’t understand why he hadn’t been found.
“I get caught up in the hope and stuck between yes, he is okay, and no, he is not okay. But I’m 90 per cent sure Kawhena is not alive.”
■ Information on Kawhena can be passed on to police at (07) 348 0099, 0800 CRIMESTOPPERS or 111 if you have an immediate confirmed sighting.