Teen ‘front-foots’ tragedy
‘‘I could have gone either way, into drugs or anything.’’
Finn Macdonald
On the surface, Finn Macdonald is an ordinary young man from a small rural town, the latest in a long line of Manawatu¯ farmers.
As a child he woke to birdsong, close to wha¯nau and not far from friends. Everything was sweet.
But for nearly a decade, his life was unrecognisable from the peaceful pastures of Colyton, near Feilding.
In 2010 his uncle, Scott Guy, was murdered at the gate of his farm. Macdonald’s dad Ewen was accused of the murder. In 2012, he was found not guilty.
‘‘I walked into my mum’s room, and she said, ‘I have something to tell you, but we’ll wait for the others’.’’
By that time he was 7 and the eldest of four children.
‘‘I just wanted to watch Hi-5, but Mum told me Dad had been accused of killing Scott.
‘‘I remember thinking, ‘oh, my dad’s a baddy [sic] now?’’’
The murder remains unsolved despite more than 100 police working on the case and conducting 2500 interviews.
After his father’s trial, Finn’s mum moved the children to Auckland. His father went to jail for unrelated crimes uncovered during the investigation.
‘‘Feilding was my life, I never wanted to move... all of my family and friends are here, and Auckland is so busy,’’ he said.
He was enrolled in a school on the North Shore with more than 2000 pupils, a culture shock from Colyton School’s roll of 67.
Being lost in the crowd was almost useful for him, not having to worry about the frenzy of people waiting outside the courthouse hoping for a glimpse of his dad and family.
When it came time to start NCEA in 2019, Finn returned to Feilding to live with his maternal grandparents, Bryan and Jo Guy, so he could attend Feilding High School.
He said his old friends embraced him like no time had passed at all, but he still kept to himself. ‘‘I guess I just did my work, didn’t get in trouble... kept my head down.’’
The year he returned was the same year Cactus launched, a military-style leadership programme for young people.
Police officers shoulder tapped participants because they were either known to police, the school thought someone needed to get out of their shell, or to develop leadership skills.
Finn was chosen for all the above.
‘‘I was just in maths, in a test, the deputy principal walked in and said, ‘can I grab Finn for a minute?’ I thought, ‘oh no, what have I done?’
‘‘Then I get to his office and there’s a police officer, and I’m thinking, ‘oh no, I’m really in trouble’.’’
He described the idea of an eight-week programme, which included gruelling exercises led by local military officers, as ‘‘my worst nightmare’’ but said he came out of it a different person.
‘‘The self-confidence he gained... he suddenly got actively involved in school, decided he wanted to be a school captain... started talking about what he wanted to do when he finished school... it was great,’’ his grandmother Jo Guy said.
Bryan Guy said Finn’s mental fitness improved more than his physical fitness.
‘‘Losing someone you love, a child, a father... it’s so tough on family. But we decided early on we would stick together, and it’s not going to destroy us.
‘‘When you front-foot the elephant in the room, it can’t hurt you.’’
Finn is an ambassador for Cactus, sharing his story with different groups.
‘‘I lost someone I looked up to... a lot changed... but if my story can change someone else’s life, make it better, I want to tell it. I could have gone either way, into drugs or anything.’’
Over a decade later, the young man, now 18, had completed high school and was about to begin a building apprenticeship.
Like he did as a child, he now wakes to birdsong and helps his grandfather on the land.
He and his father keep in touch.
Mayor Helen Worboys started the Feilding Cactus programme with local police officer Allan McClean in 2019.
She said every intake had several Macdonalds: kids who had huge potential, but were held back by circumstance.
‘‘Seeing how it helps makes the early mornings all worth it. It gives them the skills to make good choices, and that they shouldn’t be afraid of police.’’