Building mum’s forever-bed a labour of love
Josh Holden has made his mum’s final bed with wood and wool.
The base and sides are pine, the handles are harakeke and her forever-mattress is a thick nest of hand-washed fleece.
It is made to measure, and the Raumati man will drive it from Ka¯ piti to his mum’s Coromandel home. When she dies – which will be soon – he will drive her back to Wellington, where she will be buried under a kowhai tree at Makara Cemetery.
Margaret Holden’s bed is a coffin made of all-natural materials and her son feels lucky he could build it for her.
She has been sick with cancer for years but it was during a recent hospital stay the idea came up. ‘‘It was about four months ago when she asked if I’d make her coffin and I was pretty happy to do it,’’ Josh Holden said.
It was a job he recommended to anyone traversing the landscape of loss; the work was cathartic, the process a happy one.
‘‘Building mum’s bed was a peaceful experience, remembering the good times, what she likes and I tried to incorporate this into the coffin.
‘‘It’s something you can do when there’s nothing else you can do.’’ Coffins had never been something to be scared of and Margaret’s was no different, Holden said. His friends had tried it out and Izzy the dog slept in it.
‘‘Mum loves dogs and Izzy is going to have a front row seat at her funeral.’’
Speaking from her Waihi home, Margaret was delighted at the idea of Izzy sleeping in her coffin. ‘‘I think it’s lovely, she’s a lovely dog and she’s welcome to hop in any time.’’
A keen organic gardener, a natural funeral was important to Margaret but she had been unsure if her son could manage the coffin making.
‘‘ I worried it might be too hard emotionally but he said it was an honour.
‘‘I’m so proud of him.’’
A strong faith meant she was not afraid of death – it was, in fact, something she was excited about.
‘‘I’m looking forward to the next life, this one is only temporary.’’
She had seen photos of the coffin and was delighted with it; no longer in pain, she was ready for her bed.
‘‘My life hasn’t ended, I just go on to the next one. I told everyone not to wear black, they have to wear colour.
‘‘Death is just another stage. ‘‘A funeral is a party.’’