Hockey hotshot’s pot shots show she’s boss
Jumping in front of a hurtling projectile seems a great idea.
For this annual try-somethingyou-normally-wouldn’t series, I’ve jacked up gun Black Stick Michaela Curtis to come and smack some hockey balls at me.
Curtis has played 57 games for New Zealand and the diminutive striker can give it a good whack. Luckily for me she hasn’t hit a ball since she broke her thumb at the National Hockey League in September, so was slightly underdone for this big encounter.
My hockey experience is limited to a couple of very modest seasons in division three with the Massey Kings, aka the Massey Big Rigs, so the thought of jumping in the way of a hurtling hockey ball doesn’t thrill me.
Getting into the goalie gear, outstanding protective gear from Palmerston North supplier Obo too, I might I add, takes long enough. Surely that means I can’t get hurt, but as the Obo website says: ‘‘Hockey balls are hard and travel bloody fast’’.
Self-preservation is top of the agenda and watching the ball fly into the goal before I’m even in it doesn’t make me want to jump in front of the ball.
Many athletes would love to be in this position, taking pot shots at a reporter who’s written about them. The balls are humming off Curtis’ stick and to start I can’t get out of the way fast enough.
After a few confidence boosters I can boot the odd shot away with the kickers, big protective pads to go over your feet and a godsend in a situation like this.
There might be one good save out of the whole lot but more often than not the ball is hammering into the back of the goal.
Curtis has the ball on a string but thank goodness it’s not an actual game with more attackers running in at high speed – the fatal bullet could come from anyone in that case.
But good news, I survive the ordeal – thanks again, Obo.
At the end Curtis fires a reverse stick up into the top corner of the net just to make sure I know who’s boss.
I may need a coaching session or two before taking the keeping gear for the Big Rigs.