Crusaders win a camouflaged game which turned off this viewer

New Zealand needs a strong Crusaders outfit for the good of rugby, just not like the one which staggered to the much-awaited win over the Melbourne Rebels. History will show the Crusaders won 39-0 last weekend, but for the most part it was unwatchable and needs some perspective.

The Rebels were hopeless. Their scrum capitulated from the first time they locked shoulders, All Blacks prop Fletcher Newell single-handedly murdering them.

They were as disinterested as when they trailed the Hurricanes 33-0 after 32 minutes in Palmerston North in March.

And yet the Crusaders were so beset by mistakes, spills and rogue passes that they led by only 10-0 at halfway, at which time I abandoned my perch to go peel feijoas. It was more fun watching club rugby.

The individual Crusaders players are good enough so it must come back to coaching because their onfield systems seem out of whack. They don’t have Sam Whitelock nor Richie Mounga nor Will Jordan to rescue them, but trawl through their lineup. In their squad of 23 for that game were 10 who had worn the All Blacks’ jersey and Johnny McNicholl who had worn red for Wales.

That would surely have been enough for coach Scott Robertson to have got things done efficiently, even with two of them fossilised former All Black props.

The way they’ve been going we must ask how Dallas McLeod became an All Black last year.

There’s a dearth of first five-eighths throughout the country and it’s desperation that the Crusaders have now signed 36-year-old Toby Arnold who few of us can barely remember.

It’s obvious the South Island cannot populate two Super Rugby teams and with the Crusaders’ woes this year, fewer North Islanders are likely to flock there on a rugby pilgrimage as in the past. One of the Crusaders’ best has been No 8 Christian Lio-Willie, the young dentist whose home is West Auckland. The Hurricanes 2nd XV, the Hunters, have twice belted the Crusaders backup side.

The quality of the Highlanders’ 7-6 win over the Force at Dunedin was another shocker, another channel switcher.

When Super Rugby brought in Moana Pasifika, it scuttled the Highlanders because many of those Moana men would’ve found contracts in Dunedin. Now the Highlanders have had to scour overseas and dive into the Otago NPC ranks.

The Wahs need more Up

The hype appears to have got to the Warriors in the NRL.

They’re only either starting well or finishing well and are up against gritty Australian teams such as the Gold Coast

Titans who were under intense heat just to get one win.

The Warriors were lavished with praise by Australian pundits until they folded against the Dragons at Wollongong after a frothy start. Those same Dragons were then pumped 60-18 by the Sydney Roosters. Surely on Sunday the Warriors can topple the Knights in Newcastle without their talisman, Kayln Ponga, the former Manawatū golfer.

It’s disturbing that Mt Smart Stadium hasn’t yet become a fortress for the Warriors. They do have to fly at 40,000 feet across the Tasman for every second game, which can be taxing as our Super Rugby teams have found. The Australian NRL teams come to New Zealand only once and can approach it as a one-off.

Meanwhile, rugby league opinionator Paul Kent, must surely have done his dash. He’s been the centrepiece of the abrasive NRL 360 show, one of the few lively sports debates on Sky.

His suspension by Fox Sport and his Daily Telegraph newspaper for brawling outside a pub in Sydney was unbecoming a 54-year-old who derides NRL players for misbehaving.

“Kenty” and his opinions on NRL 360 have been very aggressive since his return from his first suspension and with his muffled sentences he has continually over-talked and even demeaned journalist Buzz Rothfield.

Finau a selection risk

Chiefs flanker Samipeni Finau needs to pull his … shoulders in.

He looks to be out to cripple opposing first five-eighths and while most of his tackles may be legal, only just, some aren’t.

They’re similar to the kamikaze hits by “The Chiropractor”, Samoan Brian Lima, between 1990 and 2007.

The risk comes if Finau misjudges a tackle while playing for the All Blacks and takes someone’s head off, the damage could be orthopaedically challenging and a red card. He has a reputation now and the Waratahs were within their rights to give it air last week.

Double tonner

Manawatū Standard reporter George Heagney became the first Massey University rugby player outside of their Varsity A side to receive a club blazer.

He played his 200th game for Varsity Vets on Saturday, believed to be a club record. These days he is a sturdy halfback who has worn every jersey except No 2 and No 10.