What to look for when selecting a funeral director?

The death of someone close is a time of sadness when a range of emotions are experienced. Having a meaningful farewell allows your loved ones to gather, support one another, remember, and celebrate your life and begin the journey of saying goodbye.

Funeral Directors have a complex and vitally important event to organise and run for a family who are highly emotional with grief. Funerals are a one-off event and cannot be rerun if something is not right and what is more, we are only just beginning to discover the long-term harm of a poorly run funeral or indeed no funeral at all. Mental wellbeing is not something we fully understand, and grief is one of the most powerful emotions that can negatively impact on our mental wellbeing if it is not managed well. A meaningful farewell makes a positive contribution to our grieving and our mental well-being.

We need to remember that a funeral is for the living. It is the start of the process where a family comes to terms with the sudden loss of a loved one and starts to understand how life will now be different with that person not being physically present as they were. One of our most precious gifts to our family when we go is a meaningful farewell to help them along that journey.

So how can we avoid the scammers, the cowboys, and also make sure that we leave our loved ones with the precious gift of a meaningful farewell. We find someone who knows what they are doing and ask them to do it. So how do we find such a person and how do we know if they do know what they are doing?

1. Find a funeral director who is committed to a written set of standards with ethical principles and ask for a copy. This provides the evidence that they know what they are doing because it is written down. As part of that also ask to see a copy of their contract for service.

This sets out what they will deliver and what you or your estate will pay for. Finally ask for a written estimate so you know the cost before the event and not have it as a surprise afterwards.

2. Find a funeral director who is subject to a regular inspection process to make sure that they are complying with the standards they have.

3. Find a funeral director who is subject to an independent complaints process. If something goes wrong or just isn’t quite right, you need someone you can go to, to get advice or help and who has the power to do something to make it right. That someone must be independent to make the process worthwhile and the funeral director must submit to that process. 4. Find a funeral director who is part of a national organisation that provides training and professional development so that the funeral director keeps up to date with current legislation and the latest thinking on how to make a farewell meaningful.

Quite frankly, there are no real surprises in this list, and it is what you should expert when dealing with any professional or trades person. You can find funeral directors who meet these 4 simple requirements and can be your assurance of a meaningful farewell. Make sure that precious gift is all you want it to be, and your family needs it to be.

For your assurance of a meaningful farewell visit www.funeraldirectors.co.nz to find your local Funeral Directors Association Member.