Nelson Mail

What does that word pa¯keha¯ mean to you?

- Joel Maxwell

To write about all things Ma¯ ori, when for some the very use of te reo Ma¯ ori is an act of incitement, makes the most inoffensiv­e writing seem confrontat­ional. I’m just a learner. A man with Ma¯ ori and

Pa¯ keha¯ parents who wants to find himself through his language. But my public displays of affection for te reo send some people wobbling into nosepinchi­ng disgust. I think this needs addressing.

Perhaps unsurprisi­ngly, one of the most troublesom­e words I use is one of the most common in Aotearoa, and most commonly misunderst­ood: the word ‘‘pa¯ keha¯ ’’.

Did you feel an immediate clenching of muscles around your body, a flinch, at the word? Does it stimulate adrenaline? Well let’s be calm and take a closer look at the word that, after all, has a pretty simple meaning.

Pa¯ keha¯ was actually the word used for vertical cloud formations that resembled the tails of a popular English turn-of-the-century pet, the madagascan lemur.

No, sorry, pa¯ keha¯ is the term for people, usually over 35, who temporaril­y forget ‘‘turn-of-thecentury’’ now applies to two points in time – old and more recent. They meant the one with cockney chimney sweeps, not S Club 7.

Nope, sorry, pa¯ keha¯ was first coined by Mark Twain to describe individual teeth lost from his wooden dentures. The famed American writer was quoted in his official biography using the word while speaking to his wife. ‘‘I swallowed a pa¯ keha¯ with my grits. Fetch my bed pan won’t you, Olivia.’’

Pa¯ keha¯ refers to confusion created when a lefthanded person shakes hands with a right-hander. A state of temporary embarrassm­ent named after the one-handed pamphletee­r Gordon Pa¯ keha¯ Stowers, who infamously shook hands with the bear Ezekiel the Brute in Philadelph­ia Zoo on a dare from poet Walt Whitman. Pa¯ keha¯ -Stowers, one-handed after an organ-grinding accident, said the bear was delightful­ly playful.

Forget that, the term pa¯ keha¯ was actually first used in computer programmin­g for lines of Basic code that were spelt the same forwards as backwards. The world-record was the 8000-line program created by pioneer coder Florek Lofgren for his Downhill Skiing game on the Commodore 64. In an ironic twist, Lofgren died in 1988 while skiing, of gunshot wounds.

Actually, pa¯ keha¯ was the name for the double raised-fist sign given by competitiv­e inline skaters. ‘‘Les pa¯ keha¯ triomphant­s’’ is usually shouted while the fists are raised, by competitor­s crossing the finish line in the Gallic-influenced sport.

No, I seem to recall, to ‘‘turn the pa¯ keha¯ ’’ refers to a briefly popular 1950s dance style that consisted of non-synchronis­ed hand and eye movements. The sequence began with both hands crossed under the chin, fingers interlocke­d. The dancers’ eyes looked down their nose, suggestive­ly, at their partner. (‘‘Turning the pa¯ keha¯ ’’ was made famous in the 1958 musical Fingers of Fortune. The movie was banned in 23 US states after Harvard psychologi­sts conclusive­ly linked sexual licentious­ness in humans with the use of eyes and hands.)

Actually, William Shakespear­e’s last word before his death in 1616 was ‘‘pa¯ keha¯ the’’, the word for a weapon from the Elizabetha­n era whereby gentlemen gamblers hid a second, smaller sword inside the point of their main sword.

Forget that, the Chrysler Pa¯ keha¯ was the topselling family sedan in 1967. It famously came with a basket attached to the engine as part of the underbonne­t cooking fad. The advertisin­g tagline was ‘‘Pick a Pa¯ keha¯ – power a picnic’’. Later models also made coffee.

Nope, actually, the word was the name of the third most popular marsupial mascot in the semiprofes­sional Japanese Bowling League: Pa¯ keha¯ the Possum. No, actually, pa¯ keha¯ is the Greek word for vampirism. Pa¯ keha¯ is the word for tiny stars left off star charts when they are updated.

Pa¯ keha¯ is the ache of regret experience­d after getting what one has always wanted. Pa¯ keha¯ is the word for new friendship discovered in very old age. Pa¯ keha¯ was a board game using McNuggets for counters. Pa¯ keha¯ is windborne conjunctiv­itis.

No. Pa¯ keha¯ is what you get when you mess with meanings. In the end, words have overlappin­g meanings: what they mean to everyone, what they mean to us. What we fear they mean.

If you don’t like the word Pa¯ keha¯ , then you should perhaps consider whether moral character dictates understand­ing. Because, I can’t tell you what Pa¯ keha¯ means, any more than I can decide your moral character.

I hope a Pa¯ keha¯ is someone who embraces the infinitely beautiful first language of this land. A person who has generosity of spirit. A person with a heart big enough to overcome defensiven­ess; who understand­s they share a land with the people who were there first.

With that meaning in mind, I hope all Pa¯ keha¯ can be happy being themselves.

I hope a Pa¯ keha¯ is someone who embraces the infinitely beautiful first language of this land. A person who has generosity of spirit.

 ??  ??
 ??  ??

Newspapers in English

Newspapers from New Zealand