Quips& Quotes

“The day I realised it can be smart to be shallow was, for me, a deep experience.” – Donald Trump quoted in the Guardian.

“I want to say thank you to President Trump. Remember last year when it seemed like the Oscars were racist?” – Host Jimmy Kimmell

“This is dedicated to all the kids who sing in the rain, and all the mums who let them.” – Benj Pasek,

La La Land songwriter.

“Celebrity and secrets don’t go together. The bastards will get you in the end.”

– George Michael

“YouTube temporarily pulled a New York zoo’s live stream of a giraffe giving birth, after some complained it was sexually explicit. A zoo spokesman said their YouTube cam had been reported as containing nude content. All animals are nude! They’re all nude!”

– James Corden

“Anyone who pays to see a psychiatrist needs their head looking at.” – Woody Allen

“It’s the possibility of having a dream come true that makes life interesting.” – Paulo Coelho, The Alchemist

“Children paint the future in colours that reality can never know.” – Jude Law as Lenny Belardo in The Young Pope

“Jesus created dogs to make up for the fact that everyone else is terrible.” – writer Kendra Syrdal

“The dog is mentioned in the 18 times – the cat not even once.” – WE Farbstein, on the Old Testament.