Here’s What They Said
# “How long are you going to be asking me silly questions before I pick you up and throw you in that water there?” – Winston Peters treats political reporter Lloyd Burr with his usual respect.
# “That’s not dinner, this is an actual hate crime.”
– Last Week Tonight’s John Oliver critiques Bill English’s pineappleand-spaghetti pizza.
# “What about outfit?” – Mike Hosking asks Jacinda Ardern the tough questions.
# “Still we wait! Still the drama continues!” – Newshub’s then political editor Paddy Gower kills time during the coalition negotiations by auditioning for Waiting for Godot.
# “I would give my children to a robot.” – TV psychologist Nigel Latta embraces the future on TVNZ 1’s What Next?
# “I’m assuming that International Women’s Day is about women in parts of the world who really need help, as opposed to the Western world where things are pretty good for all of us.” – In a year when women speak out about sexual predators, Hosking Mike-splains feminism.
# “There’ll be balance up the wazoo.” – Mike Hosking promises that beneath that distressed denim exterior lurks an unbiased butt.
# “Have you ever been faced by six penises?”
– Dating series Naked Attraction. Avoid.
# “You’ve got miscarriage all over your face.” – We salute a quarter of a century of deathless dialogue on Shortie.
# “You! It is totally unacceptable in 2017 to say that women should have to answer that question in the workplace.”
– The AM Show’s Mark Richardson gets schooled by Jacinda Ardern on why it’s not okay for employers to demand to know a woman’s baby plans.
# “They’re all watching pornography and smoking skunk.” – According to Gogglebox’s
Mary, it’s been all downhill for civilisation since Vera Lynn.
# “You’re just utterly bamboozled.” – Former politician Don Brash tells The AM Show’s Duncan Garner it’s been all downhill since te reo on the radio.
# “Am I mad at God? Yeah, I’m mad at Him.” – Ousted Fox News anchor Bill O’Reilly places the blame for his professional misfortunes where it belongs. God has yet to comment.
# “I’m too weak to go with you. Please, let me know what happens.”
– Twin Peaks’ Log Lady.
# “Nolite te bastardes carborundorum” – This cod Latin phrase from The
Handmaid’s Tale could be the best advice to be had from television in these worrying times: don’t let the bastards grind you down.