Over the TEACUPS

FROM THE ARCHIVES

MISTAKEN IDENTITY

Our guests were having dinner with us and as I began to serve the meal, I was horrified to see a caterpillar in the saucepan of peas. As unobtrusively as possible, I picked it out and disposed of it. The following night, I opened the second packet of the same brand of frozen peas and again after they were cooked, I discovered another caterpillar. Very irate, I had my husband write a letter of complaint to the manufacturer. They were intensely apologetic and replaced the two packets I had used. A few nights later, peas were again on the menu. As I added the customary sprig of mint, I noticed on the underside of the leaf… a caterpillar. Oops! Aunty Jilly, Auckland

BUCKS OR DANTAMS?

I was feeding the ducks and hens when I noticed a duck in the hedge. “Oh,” I thought, “That’s good – she’s sitting.” I kept a watch and when she left the nest, I went to count the eggs. To my surprise, there were 18 – nine duck eggs and nine bantam! I took out the bantam ones and left the duck eggs. Later that day, I glanced into the nest again, but the duck had gone. In her place sat the bantam hen. The next check I made, duck and bantam were there side by side on the nest. Can somebody tell me whether the offspring will quack or cheep! Doss, Eltham

OUR GUEST SPEAKER TODAY IS...

We’ve managed to procure the services of many notable artists and speakers for our various functions. Even so, we’ve never risen to the height that other local women have in their clubs. In one of our daily papers recently, this heading appeared:

“80 Women to be Entertained by St John.” Pat C., Dunedin

WHERE DO BABIES COME FROM?

A notice outside our local maternity hospital reads: “Husbands only. No children allowed.” Puzzled, Kaiapoi