Coping with homesickness can be hard
HAVING left home at the age of 18, going to work in a remote forest, then medical school, then treating university students for depression, I am certainly familiar with homesickness. Aclinical name for homesickness is adjustment disorder. There are six main types of adjustment disorder that cause a number of symptoms, including rebellious or impulsive actions, anxiety, feelings of sadness, hopelessness, or being trapped, crying and a withdrawn attitude.
Cognitive changes such as a lack of concentration and memory loss can be present, which aren’t helpful if you are starting university or a new job. A loss of self-esteem, depression and suicidal thoughtsmay also occur and physical symptoms such as insomnia, indigestion, muscle twitching and aches and fatigue may also be common.
The good news is that most cases are short-lived and will get better on their own. The mind is flooded with thoughts and emotions as people try to adjust to a new city, a new lifestyle, a new job or relationship. A psychological technique of filtering can occur where all the good things about the previous situation that the person has left are magnified while the not-so- MONIQUE FORD/STUFF good things are diminished or forgotten.
There are two main treatments for homesickness. One either goes home or one changes thoughts, attitudes and behaviour. Going home may be a short or long-term solution. Occasionally it can make things worse when one has to leave again. Because the symptoms and signs of homesickness can cause people to become socially isolated, a downward spiral can occur.
Spending time by yourself creates loneliness and people reach out to friends and family they have left behind. Spending more time doing this can result in missing opportunities to make new friends and enjoy new experiences. Reconnecting regularly with friends left behind accentuates a sense of loss and missing out.
The irony of the situation is that friends seeing new Instagram and Facebook pictures can envy the new life the person is creating and wish they had left too. A double irony is that the pictures displayed and the number of likes may mask the fact that the person posting is suffering an acute adjustment disorder and all is not well.
Having experienced homesickness a few times – on first leaving home, living in the United States and studying at San Francisco General hospital – I know it is not a nice feeling. Once, I came home early and it’s one of the few regrets in my life – I never made the Caribbean or surfed Pipeline when I was young and able enough to try. Another irony is that now I travel to remote parts of the planet on my own and am always seeking new adventure.
So, if you are experiencing an acute adjustment disorder or homesickness the treatment is simple. Force yourself to get busy. Join clubs, get active, get out and about. Meet new people, enjoy the new experiences and make the most of the situation you are in.
Homewill most likely always be there, your new opportunity may not. If your symptoms persist get some professional help. Crisis equals opportunity. Dr Tom Mulholland is a GP with 30 years’ experience in New Zealand. He’s currently on a mission, tackling health issues around New Zealand.