Problem child Trump faces exclusion
Dear Mr and Mrs Trump,
It is with great regret I find myself having to write to you again about Donald, so early in the new term. After your personal assurance that his behaviour last year was nothing but braggadocio, we agreed to take a ‘‘wait and see’’ approach. The events of the past week have me wondering whether that was a mistake.
Within a few days he has managed to irreparably damage the good relationship we had with our neighbouring school. This idea that he can spend his lunchtimes nailing up a barrier to keep the ‘‘others’’ out is unrealistic, not to mention the danger to students from errant nails and wood splinters on the playing fields. My colleague, Principal Pena, has stopped talking to me altogether and has even cancelled this week’s poker game without explanation.
Donald seems to have taken a loathing to some students and oddly, this includes all the girls, who report several instances of him storming the lectern in the school Hall and shouting ‘‘I’m the boss of you.’’ Although, thankfully, only a handful of students were there to witness these rants Donald appears to believe he has the support of the entire student body.
I accept that Donald has attention issues and is easily swayed by his poor choice of friends (together they have managed to convince the PTA to cancel the Area Schools Fair, a combined effort which you’ll be aware serves as a major source of funds.)
Their blockade of the school gates yesterday to allow ‘‘only the cool kids’’ in, is the final straw. I hope you understand that by ‘‘cool’’, Donald means anyone who looks like him. This may well have been little Steve Bannon’s idea originally, but Donald is the bigger and more intimidating child and therefore must take responsibility.
I do not like to use the word ‘‘bully’’ in connection with any child, but if his behaviour does not change I fear a mass uprising amongst the other students might ensue. The Board will be watching developments and may be moved to exclude Donald permanently.
Yours truly, Principal