My best year is waiting

With the end of the year in sight, I think it’s only fitting that I work out my New Year’s resolutions. Every year I set myself a new series of goals and every year, without fail, I return to those goals the following December and think, ‘‘oh yeah, I was meant to do that’’.

Last year I wrote my resolutions in this very column.

My hope was that my public declaration would make me accountable and spur me to action, but it was a failure on both counts.

My goals were simple; protest more (in light of the political climate) and attend more concerts.

When I wrote the column I’d already made plans to go to the Women’s March, which I did indeed attend.

The next week I went to a protest about the Muslim ban, but since then, nothing.

By comparison, I’ve been to at least half a dozen concerts.

The point is, I largely failed.

I’m not one to point the finger, but in this instance, I believe it’s necessary.

So, I turn the blame on the consumers of this column.

To those of you who read it, as well as those who use it as a coaster: why did you not remind me?

Not a single person has bothered to contact me during my struggle, unless you count 15-year-old Orin, who lovingly guided me through the reasons Duncan Garner isn’t racist and the reasons my work is s..t.

Therefore, as I sit to reflect on the year that’s been, I know that it’s not only my successes and failures that I’m reflecting on, but the failures of my readers.

The fault lies 100 per with you. I am merely a person; you are a collective. So, this year I push out on my own. I will be the one to hold me accountable. I will be the one who publicly shames me when I don’t follow through.

Because, if history is anything to go by, you can’t be trusted.

This year is the year that I actually achieve what I set out to do. This year is the year I’m going to turn it all around.

The following is an extensive, but not exhaustive, list of the changes I’ll ‘‘BLAH!’’ will just become muscle memory.

❚ Dance like nobody’s watching, by doing it alone and in private. This way no-one has to watch as you dance like nobody’s watching, but you can still look around constantly to see if people have noticed how un-selfconscious your dancing is.

❚ Set aside some time in the future to read The Power of Now.

❚ Read The Year of Yes by Shonda Rhimes, the creator of Grey’s Anatomy. Her wisdom knows no bounds. Grey’s Anatomy is still on the air. She’s very rich and very happy; so she’s either doing something right or she’s a liar. Either way, it’s exciting.

❚ Dream big, because dreams are where you can do big stuff. Real life is for the small goals. In real life, think small.

❚ Protest more.

❚ Attend more concerts.

I can’t wait for 2018 to arrive so I can usher in these new changes and have my best year yet. Or my worst year.

I won’t know for 12 months which it will be.

So, this year I push out on my own. I will be the one to hold me accountable. I will be the one who publicly shames me when I don't follow through.