Kiwis are taking the mickey
Of all the New Zealand values, one of the most precious must surely be – taking the piss. For people fleeing persecution who need to seek refuge here, or migrants who want to settle here, that’s the one value I’d want them to understand, that will help them survive living on these blessed isles.
It’s more than just a coping mechanism; it can be a barometer of your progress. It seems counter-intuitive, but New Zealanders also take the piss out of someone when they’re really comfortable around them.
Usually though, it’s mainly used for gentle, non-violent ridicule, and this week there was a great example of the appropriate opportunity for exactly when that cherished value should be applied.
It was after New Zealand First conference when MP Clayton Mitchell pitched that refugees and migrants should be made to sign up, agreeing to respect ‘‘New Zealand values’’ before they’re allowed to live here.
The level of piss-taking from all and sundry in mainstream and social media that followed has been an ideal lesson for any new arrivals to this country. Yes, values are great. Things such as egalitarianism, gender equality, secularism, religious freedom, democracy, open government, independent courts, free speech and binge drinking.
Those are all very nice and important. But you can even take the piss out of that stuff too and how it’s only bandied out when it suits some people.
Like how one of the values on NZ First’s list of values was the need to respect marriage equality, when in 2013, as the same-sex marriage bill was passed, all 7 of the party’s MPs in parliament that year voted against it.
What on earth prompted this move at the party convention? Is it all the examples we’re seeing in the news of refugees and new immigrants, disrupting same-sex ceremonies and attacking pubs because of the evil drinking that is going on?
New migrants and refugees must be tired of popping up in mentions and being demonised, whenever some politician wants to appeal to the angry wing of their party’s voters. Whatever happened to the New Zealand value of giving everyone a fair go?
One of the nicest things about living here is not being subject to a formal list of values we’re supposed to have before we’re considered proper New Zealanders.
The most important and crucial values to New Zealand are already reflected in these funny things called laws, that everyone already has to respect and obey.
If there is to be a special bit of paper that new residents have to sign at the border, it could be simplified to the values that will lead to a harmonious life for everyone here who just wants the freedom and security to try and live their best life.
The lessons that I’ve been introduced to since primary school that seem to reflect what New Zealanders really value: Things like ‘‘no one likes a show off’’ and ‘‘don’t be a dickhead.’’
Although to be fair to NZ First, this country has already seen what can happen when wildly unchecked immigration leads to a foreign language taking over, and a complete uprooting and suppression of the existing culture and values.
And Ma¯ ori have been trying to recover ever since.