Keep on keeping on
Grace Millane loved to travel – even lived to travel – but it was her backpacking journey to New Zealand that led to her death. As her father David calls on young travellers to not let his family’s tragedy deter them from the joy of journeying, three writ
Grace Millane’s death shook New Zealand, and reverberated throughout the world. She arrived on our shores, a 21-year-old on her first big adventure after graduating university. She was beginning her life, and as she approached her 22nd birthday on December 2, it was one full of hope, full of emoji-strewn Instagram posts about the Inca Trail and Machu Picchu; the Grand Canyon and New York, Boston; and Cape Reinga.
Although the murder investigation has prompted an outpouring of emotions around the country as well as debates ranging from how the media reports on violent deaths to the safety of young backpackers, it was Grace’s father, David Millane, who cut through the miasma of grief and national guilt when he pointed to his daughter’s love of travel.
He urged us not to let her death cloud our opinion of the world around us – or to forego the Kiwi rite of passage to go travelling.
‘‘We all hope that what has happened to Grace will not deter even one person from venturing out into the world and discovering their own OE’’
When departing for my first solo, international adventure in my early 20s, my mother offered a piece of advice I’ve clung to ever since: ‘‘Don’t be afraid to ask for help.’’
She was worried, I suppose, that when things inevitably went wrong, I’d try to muddle through on my own and end up worse off or, at least, missing a few flights or trains.
Travelling on my own became a reason to shed my usually quiet, nervous demeanour and replace it with a more confident, approachable self. I found I liked it. What’s more, my mother was right; most people are good and want to help others.
Lost in a maze of streets in Kathmandu, with a dead cellphone and empty wallet, strangers showed me the way home.
In Seoul, dining alone, a man sitting near me interpreted my order for the waitress and proffered a dumpling from his own plate, saying, ‘‘You didn’t order this, but please try it.’’
Often, asking for help is the same as asking someone to be your friend – to share