Love at first bite
The globe’s greatest gastronomy
Yes, I’m a frequent fryer and food is never far away when I’m roaming. I’ve been on the road for four years, with my taste buds as the compass. The journey has taken me everywhere from an underwater restaurant in the Maldives, to huddling over a stove eating momo (dumplings) in the Himalayas. It has been a gastronomic rollercoaster.
I’m not going to lie, it’s also gone wrong. Very wrong. In Sri Lanka, I had such violent food poisoning I didn’t even have the luxury of making it to the bathroom. In Singapore, there was the urgent colonoscopy after unwittingly ingesting too much bright red dragon fruit. And then there was the time I ate a wriggling octopus leg in South Korea. It needed to be chewed for 10 minutes to ensure the suction cups didn’t stick to my throat, a mistake that has killed people in the past.
But for every food-tastrophy, there are always many more moments that make travel the best experience you can have.
And, we’re blessed at Aotearoa too – some of the most memorable food I’ve eaten is right here.
Words are like carbs – they’ve got to be consumed wisely – so without further ado, here are 10 moments guaranteed to be love at first bite.
The Avocado Show – Amsterdam
A modest little shop in a trendy part of Amsterdam is a shrine to the avocado, its worshippers throngs of Millennials who see the green fruit as an edible social symbol.
It’s called The Avocado Show, and as you’d expect, everything is created from green goodness. Fries are made from avocado with a panko crust, there’s a green-covered ‘‘nacho mountain’’ and even wagyu burger, with avocados for buns.
If you are a fan of avocados, you’ll be saying hass ta la vista to your family and heading to the Netherlands.
Leaning Tower of Avocado – Christchurch
If Europe is out of the question, a very close second for avocado lovers is found in Christchurch.
Aucklanders, have you ever paid $22 for smashed avocado, only to find a microscopic smear of green? You’d be forgiven for going to the Commerce Commission, after realising the only thing that got smashed was your wallet.
But, fear not. There is a trendy little organic eatery in central Christchurch that does a smashed avocado, so enormous, if you flew it to Auckland you could trade it in for waterfront property.
Barefoot Eatery is a celebration of all things natural; part of a new central city wellbeing complex called The Welder. Its smoothie bowls and juices will have you thinking you’re in Bali and Barefoot’s smashed avocado on fermented organic seed loaf is heaven on toast.
Pizza – Naples
Forget the medieval canals of Venice, the enchanting churches of Florence or the ruins of Rome – the best thing I’ve done in Italy is head on a pizza pilgrimage.
Pizza was invented in Naples, where pizza masters are known as ‘‘maestros’’, the equivalent of cooking gods.
We sat down with five of the city’s top-rated chefs, and tried their offerings. At first glance, it looked like a few toppings dumped on a bit of floppy bread – but true Neapolitan pizza is a masterclass in taste.
If you make it to Naples, visit Antonio & Antonio and order a margarita. Cheesus Crust, it’s good.
Langos – Budapest
Langos is easily my favourite comfort food. It’s a simple concept: a deep-fried flatbread with toppings like sour cream and cheese. It’s best eaten straight out of the fryer as the toppings are still melting.
While in Hungary, you’ll also need to try goulash, an elaborate beef stew flavoured with the national spice: paprika.
Mi Goreng Toastie, Sydney
The Dutch Smuggler has created a two-minute noodle toastie, that defies all culinary logic, and tastes downright delicious.
It’s called the Mi Goreng Toastie, and it almost broke the internet when pictures started going viral. I didn’t remotely expect the taste to match the hype, but I was woefully wrong.
The sandwich is created with a considerable portion of spicy noodles, packed together with cheese, a fried egg, and ‘‘secret sauce’’ – then toasted between two bits of sourdough. It’s not to be missed if you happen to be in Sydney.
Cookie Pie – Auckland and Christchurch
A cookie kingdom is being built in New Zealand, and its fans include super-star Lorde.
Moustache Milk and Cookie Bar specialises in molten biscuits, and anyone with a sweet tooth will instantly become a lifelong devotee.
It’s the brainchild of 28-year-old cookie wizard Deanna Yang, who documents her 5am trips to McDonald’s to do her accounts on social media; it’s the only free time she has in her day as she grows her empire.
The cookie bars are found in Auckland and Christchurch, and you need to start with a cookie pie, filled with molten centres like Nutella or Snickers.
Kottu – Sri Lanka
Over a three-month stay in Sri Lanka my taste buds went on a journey from utter joy to a spiceinduced nuclear meltdown.
You’ll want to try Kottu, a roti chopped up with vegetables and meat. It is essentially Sri Lanka’s hamburger.
Also unmissable are string hoppers; they are similar to rice noodles served with sambal or a sweet coconut sauce.
Being an island nation, it’s also easy to find an excellent fish curry for just a few dollars.
Underwater – Maldives
The most memorable location I’ve ever eaten was at an underwater restaurant in the Maldives. The resort is called Hurawalhi, and the restaurant was designed and built by Kiwis.
Here, fortunes have turned, and for once humans are in a tank being watched by fish. And the underwater life is stunning, with octopus, sharks and eagle rays often spotted.
Just a tip, don’t order fish. The guilt of having a nautical neighbour, while consuming one, is a little distracting.
Butter chicken burger
Melbourne is a culinary treasure-trove, with an uncountable list of great places to feast.
If you like burgers and Indian, your first stop needs to be Burger Shurger, which will send your taste buds on a journey from New York to New Delhi.
The concept is Indian fusion, yet the burgers have all the finesse of the Big Apple’s finest.
The butter chicken burger is the best I’ve eaten, while the butter chicken poutine is also heavenly. One burger even has a samosa tucked inside.
Singapore’s hawker stalls
For all Singapore’s modern glitz, the best place to take your taste buds is on a safari through the unpretentious Hawker Stalls that sizzle throughout the city.
There are more than 100 of the markets, featuring more than 6000 stalls, with delights from all over the world.
Don’t go past the world’s first hawker stall to be awarded a Michelin star. At Chinatown’s Liao Fan Hawker Chan, you’ll get an award-winning meal of soya sauce chicken, rice and noodles for just a few dollars.