THE SINGLE MUM
When Kate Davidson had baby Solomon 15 months ago, her birthing partner was a friend and fellow solo mum.
Davidson had known it might not work out with Solomon’s dad, but the 38-year-old’s biological clock was ticking. She was single from the second trimester of pregnancy.
One of five kids, her parents split up when she was 12 and her mum mainly looked after her.
‘‘I guess it seemed normal that women play that role. So I think I was just like, ‘oh yeah, I can do this’... The only worry is the financial side of stuff.
‘‘I only plan to have one child, so I want to put my all into it.’’
Davidson, who works in communications, left her job and took a year off – funded by maternity leave and government support. She now does part-time contract jobs from home.
Ironically, she found it easier to stay home for a year than some partnered friends, as they couldn’t get government support. But the income thresholds make life a tricky juggle.
‘‘I just try to balance how much I can work, earn, spend time with him and get support.’’
Davidson has some internalised disquiet about being a solo mum: ‘‘Oh, what do people think?’’. But she’s not sure if that stigma actually exists.
‘‘I feel really fortunate that I’m able to have this experience without having to fulfil those traditional norms.
‘‘Some people don’t partner up in life, so making it accessible to do it alone I think is really great. And trying to remove any stigma about it, in that families come in all shapes and sizes, and that’s fine.
‘‘It’s more about you raising your child in a safe, loving home, with respect, rather than ‘Oh there’s a mum and dad, three kids and the dog’.’’