Recreational activity

Viruses, the experts tell us, exist for one purpose: to reproduce themselves. In this respect, they’re not so very different from us. All the lockdowns, all the quarantine measures, and all the contact-tracing apps are no match for that very human imperative, as it seems American basketball is about to find out.

National Basketball Association games, watched by millions around the world, have been suspended since March by the pandemic outbreak. The NBA plans to get back on its feet – and back on the world’s TV screens – by basing 22 teams at the Walt Disney World resort in Florida, where they will keep to their own bubble for the next three months.

It’s not a plan that has been universally welcomed by the players. The game’s biggest star, LeBron James, has jokily compared heading to Florida with going to prison. And as one US pundit has pointed out, it does not factor in the players’ expectations of ‘‘recreational activities’’ – what the rest of us would call sex. They’ve already been reported to have broken out in search of better food, so one doesn’t need a vivid imagination to wonder how far they’d go for other comforts.

Melbourne’s latest Covid outbreak has been blamed on security guards sleeping with infected guests in isolation hotels. One suggestion for controlling the wayward behaviour of some of our own returnees is to put them in electronic ankle bracelets. Might cold showers and bromide in their tea be a more appropriate solution?