‘I felt lost, defeated’

Ameena (not her real name) said she felt defeated when she found out her parents wanted her to marry someone against her will. She sought help from Shakti and was able to prevent the marriage. She wrote about her experience.

“My parents were forcing me into marriage, to the point that my father flew here from overseas for a week to try and force me into it in person.

“I realised it was wrong when my parents were making the decision for me to spend the rest of my life with a complete stranger who was significantly older than me. It felt completely wrong and against all my moral standards. I did not know him, I did not like him. I was not prepared to give up my happiness for mere convenience.

“I know that listening to your parents seems like the right thing to do. But if it feels wrong, it’s wrong. Do what your heart tells you to do, fall in love and spend the rest of your happy life with that person, that is what makes life worth living for.

“I felt lost and completely defeated, because family are the people that you go to when you are feeling hurt and alone. I had no one to support me when I was going through this. You either have to listen to them and make them happy, but when you do that you have sacrificed your entire life up ahead. If I did not listen to them, I would have to live the rest of my life in shame with my family for not listening to them and rejecting a proposal.

“I also felt that I would never feel happy again. If I had agreed to it, I would move from a psychologically abusive family to an abusive husband. Having to deal with emotional/physical abuse as well as rape.”