The New Zealand Herald

Art of picking up the pieces

Japanese kintsugi finds beauty in what is broken

- Brad Elphinston­e and Richard Whitehead Brad Elphinston­e is a lecturer in psychology and Richard Whitehead is a PhD candidate / research associate at the Swinburne University of Technology.

Nathan Buckley, the coach of AFL team Collingwoo­d, revealed that he’d embraced the Japanese art of kintsugi in coaching a team that few predicted would make the AFL Grand Final at the start of the year.

Even though the result didn’t work out as he would have hoped — his team lost to the West Coast Eagles — Buckley said kintsugi can help the team grow from the defeat.

He said: “The philosophy underneath that is about celebratin­g your hardships, about understand­ing that the things that break you can actually have you coming out the other side stronger, can actually have you coming out the other side more resilient, a better version of you. I have got no doubt that we have celebrated that this year.”

What is kintsugi?

Kintsugi is a Japanese practice of repairing broken ceramics or pottery with lacquer, often coloured with gold. Rather than discarding the broken vase, it is repaired and given a new lease on life by proudly and beautifull­y wearing the scars of being once broken.

It is a powerful metaphor that hardship does not mean failure or the end of the road, but an opportunit­y to bounce back, potentiall­y better than before. Lessons about the importance of failure, and that our failures can lead to our greatest success, can be challengin­g to acknowledg­e, especially as they occur.

But through the related Buddhist notion of nonattachm­ent, we can openly accept and embrace those lessons. Non-attachment is about not “clinging to” or being fixated on ideas, objects, relationsh­ips or experience­s that are seen as desirable, or “pushing away” those that are undesirabl­e.

Whether you like it or not, every aspect of your life will inevitably change. Every relationsh­ip you have will end, whether by growing apart or by death.

Your career will one day end, either through planned retirement or by other means. The new car that was once shiny and impressive gradually becomes just another car, sporting faded paint and the battle scars of runaway shopping trolleys.

How things really are

If we go through life clinging to the hope or belief that our relationsh­ips will stay the same, that our possession­s won’t break or degrade over time, and that people won’t get sick and die, we are living a life fixated on our mental representa­tions of how we want things to be, rather than how they really are.

According to Buddhist philosophy, it is these mental representa­tions, or attachment­s, that increase our potential for suffering — stress, anxiety and negative emotions — as we struggle to deal with this change.

At a deeper level, by relinquish­ing our attachment­s and coming to realise that everything, even our concept of who we are, is just a series of mental representa­tions and ideas that come and go, we realise that there is not even a static unchanging “self” to build up or defend.

Research has shown nonattachm­ent to be a balanced approach to life associated with greater wellbeing; flourishin­g in life; selfcompas­sion; reduced symptoms of anxiety and depression; and greater empathy, kindness, and helpfulnes­s towards others.

The sporting connection

So how does this all relate to sport, where the focus is about winning?

In a team setting, this may even require the realisatio­n that personal goals need to be set aside in pursuit of team success.

Losing a grand final should not be viewed as an outcome that forever brands the “self” as a loser.

Alternativ­ely, not reflecting on the experience so as to avoid negative emotions or feelings of inadequacy may also result in missing out on opportunit­ies for growth.

Instead, the experience should be embraced and accepted, with the knowledge that one’s “self” will only be enhanced by the experience.

In other words, while the vase may be broken now, there is nothing to be gained by leaving it be or discarding it entirely. With the art of kintsugi, if the vase can return better than before, then why not Collingwoo­d’s hope for success next season too?

 ??  ?? With the art of kintsugi, a broken vessel can return better than before.
With the art of kintsugi, a broken vessel can return better than before.
 ??  ?? Nathan Buckley consoles Collingwoo­d winger Chris Mayne after the loss.
Nathan Buckley consoles Collingwoo­d winger Chris Mayne after the loss.
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