SNAPCHAT with Natalie Medlock

My first job was . . . teaching piano to kids.

It taught me . . . that kids have to learn to colour inside the lines.

My big break came . . . What big break? Ummm biggest break for a non-big-breaker? Christ Almighty at the Basement Theatre, a play I co-wrote. I think that was how I got on Shortland Street. Then they killed me (Christmas cliff-hanger) but then I made my way into writing at the storylining table. Turned out I wasn’t terrible and since then I’ve continued to write as a hired gun and work on my own slate.

The last job I quit was . . . as story producer for Neighbours. I quit because of the immense amount of work, but the people were absolutely gorgeous. Plus, let’s be honest, there’s only so much that can happen in a cul-de-sac. The most famous person I’ve ever met is . . . Robbie Magasiva. It was after Christ Almighty. He was playing Donkey and I was playing The Three Wise Men (we wrote him as one schizophrenic man). I had a hospital gown on which showed my arse. I blacked out my teeth and had a bald skull cap on. Oh, and a huge homemade merkin that hung below my knees. I came out of the dressing room and he was talking to my father — who had bought him a beer and had no idea who he was — guess he just liked Robbie’s Donkey (sounds rude). I introduced myself — “Ah, I wrote the play.” Hewas... charming. He said later (when we started dating) that it was me flashing my merkin and arse in the finale that won his heart.

The best time I’ve had on stage

was... chasing [actress] Yvette Reid round the stage with her tits out as she yelled “Dobbo! Dobbo!” at Tom Sainsbury, who was singing Loyal on repeat (the worst impression): “Keep it that way, keeeep it that wayah.”

But the worst was . . . one time on Shortland Street I had to wear a pink PVC nurse’s outfit (you could see my knickers) and practically beg a much older man to “get it on” with me on the CEO desk. He kept muttering “I’m a married man, I’m a married man.”

My dream role would be . . .

I’m not sure — something that makes me really famous globally and then means that I can choose my roles. Otherwise, Jesus in a film that I and Tom Sainsbury have written.

See Natalie Medlock in Silo Theatre’s The Blind Date Project at Q Theatre, August 29-September 21

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