My Story. . .
best lawyer. But I couldn’t in all conscience stand there with someone’s life in my hands and look at the jury and think, this performance is going well. I had to at least try to become an actor. I auditioned for Toi Whakaari in Wellington, NIDA in Sydney and Theatre Corporate in Auckland and I was only accepted by Theatre Corporate. In 1983 I finished my law degree and in 1984 went straight to drama school and I never looked back.
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One of my early TV jobs was Erebus: The Aftermath. I played the junior counsel for Air New Zealand and I argued in front of the Court of Appeal long before any of my friends at law school did. I’ve also played Atticus Finch, the most famous lawyer of all time, and the first play I directed for the ATC was 12 Angry Men, so I’ve managed to incorporate some of my past lives into my theatre career and work through some of my legal issues on stage. One of the great things about being creative, whatever experiences you go through, whether they’re painful or exuberant, you can draw on them later and give them an artistic outlet.
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I was cast by the Pop-Up Globe and was part of the company that took two plays to Melbourne for five months. During that time my father became very sick. I came home over Christmas and was with him when he died. My brother, who also had health issues, took the death of our father very poorly and the day I returned to Melbourne he took his own life. I lost the last two members of my family in very close proximity and, as you can imagine, I was full of grief. But I thought of my experience beforehand, working night after night on those Shakespeare plays, with my whole soul expanding, so I didn’t feel overwhelmed, because I’d been given a way of dealing with such big emotions. That’s another thing I’m grateful for — with the work that we do, we send ourselves and our souls to some very dark places, and sometimes some very joyful places, and we are stretched by the experiences and that helps us cope.
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I was a very ambitious actor when I was young and I was very grateful to Janice Finn for creating
Gloss and giving me that big break. The whole point of that show was to create stars, but something also captured the zeitgeist. Over 30 years later, I still get clocked by people but, my feeling is, if someone gives a f*** about something I did 30 years ago, I’m chuffed.
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I’m a political junkie and I took on the mayoral campaign in 2010 when it looked as if John Banks would win. Bob Harvey was going to stand, then he didn’t, so it was almost like a protest, and I had nothing to lose and everything to gain. Len Brown, Andrew Williams and Colin Craig then threw their hats into the ring and I ended up being one of the top five candidates. I had a fly-on-the-wall experience of the very first Super City election, up against four extremely interesting people.
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Twenty-three people stood for mayor and I came fifth, behind three sitting mayors. But running for public office invites a lot of intrusion, everyone has a right to walk into your life, and it’s a big commitment. I don’t regret a second of it, but I don’t think I’d be in a hurry to do it again.
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Things have happened in my personal life which were not things I could keep running away from, or hiding from with drink or drugs and there came a moment of truth when my mother was dying of emphysema. I knew I’d done things that had brought her great joy and also things that had caused her great disappointment, and I spent over a year with her as she was dying. It was a sobering experience, and I was brought to a point where I know I had to either deal with things or destroy myself. I’m enormously grateful to have had that opportunity to find redemption, and nursing mum was a big part of my healing.
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For better or worse, I’ve always had the freedom to do what I want in life. I’ve had some amazing times and I’ve done some stupid things. I’m lucky the stupid things didn’t kill me or totally spin me out into space and I’m enormously fortunate to have been given another chance. I’m grateful for everything that I have, and I’m not bitter about the things I don’t have. I am philosophical. I’m going to be 60 next year and I want to make the most of the rest of the years I have left. That is what drives me now and I don’t look back with regret because all those experiences are part of my life’s rich tapestry.