Sideswipe
A load of bulls***
A dispute between neighbours in Lodi Township, Michigan, has resulted in one of them (a farmer) creating a 250ft wall of cow manure along the property divide. The non-farmers are calling it a “poo wall” and complain that it smells awful. The farmer disagrees, saying that it’s merely a “compost fence”. Plus, it turns out that it’s perfectly legal since it’s on his property.
Coffee-skulling champ
Gus Comstock, coffee-drinking pride of Minnesota, today again gulped his way into the national championship. Downing 85 cupfuls in seven hours and 15 minutes, Comstock won back the title from a man in Amarillo, Texas, whose 71-cup record recently had bettered Comstock’s old mark of 62. Comstock, a barber shop porter, was cheered by a crowd that jammed a hotel where he imbibed the coffee. The hotel paid the bill. Near the end, Comstock’s gulps were somewhat laboured. When he stopped for a rest, a physician examined him and pronounced him in “pretty good shape” except for a slight fever, but the rest threw Comstock off his stride and he quit short of the 100-cup goal he had set. Comstock took his coffee with and without sugar and cream. All told, he drank 21.25 quarts, more than five gallons of coffee. (The Associated
Press, 1927)
Handbrake malfunction
“Pull up to my bumper, baby in Sideswipe reminded me of a funny story of how a car of mine once decided to ‘park itself’ very close to an Alfa Romeo in a Sydney carpark back in the early 80s,” writes John Clark. “I had bought a wonderful old white HR Holden for my planned big trip up to far North Queensland. So I drive this lovely big heavy car to show my girlfriend — and parked it in her work carpark. I get up to her office and we look out the window — and she says: ‘Gee your car is parked very close to the other one.’ Sure enough — the handbrake wasn’t too hot and my new old car had taken a little trip across the carpark and ‘nuzzled up’ to the bumper of an expensive Italian car. So I put my details on the windscreen and they got back to me claiming zillions of dollars for this small scratch. Nup — I said I’ll give you this much and named a very fair figure which was accepted. FYI The car took me thousands of trouble-free kilometres all around Queensland on the OE of a lifetime.”