‘Sweet’ revenge over Ardern slur amounts to sweet nothing
SOMEONE coming late into Parliament’s big row of the day yesterday would have assumed Paula Bennett had called Jacinda Ardern something unspeakable: a liar, hypocrite, moron or something equally nasty and unparliamentary.
Labour MPs were frowning, tutting and shaking their heads, appearing to regard the social development minister as having been pretty beastly to their young frontbencher.
But if you looked closely, it was apparent some were fighting so hard for facial control that they were in danger of swallowing their teeth. Because what Ms Bennett called Ms Ardern was ‘‘Sweetie’’.
The fact she had said, ‘‘Zip it,’’ in front of ‘‘Sweetie’’ certainly rendered the term of endearment less than affectionate. This was no Absolutely Fabulous ‘‘sweetie’’ followed by ‘‘Mwha! Mwha!’’ and lashings of Bolly.
But there was some surprise when Labour’s Leader of the House, Trevor Mallard, went on the warpath. Speaker Lockwood Smith hadn’t heard the offending remark, so Mr Mallard repeated it with prosecutorial grimness. ‘‘She said ‘Zip it, Sweetie’’’ – an exceptionally insulting way to address a young woman MP.
Most having initially chortled at the exchange, Labour MPs hastily reined down their mouth corners while Mr Mallard raged.
Dr Smith, however, believed the remark had been a bit of titfor-tat after Ms Ardern and others were interjecting while she answered a question. The term wasn’t ‘‘ideal’’, but nor was it the end of the world, he reasoned.
‘‘Compared with other language I have heard used around this House, it would appear that it was not that offensive.’’
Ms Ardern’s also youthful constituency rival, National’s Nikki Kaye, shrugged exaggerated exasperation toward the gallery, signalling she wouldn’t regard it as any great drama to be hailed as ‘‘Sweetie’’. Mr Mallard insisted it was patronising – tacitly raising the spectre of the hell there would have been to pay had a male MP addressed Ms Ardern that way.
But Dr Smith declined to rule ‘‘Zip it, Sweetie’’ out of order. Mr Mallard accepted this ruling by addressing him as ‘‘Sweetie’’ for the rest of question time, till Dr Smith – though not in so many words – told him to zip it.
The day’s luckiest minister was Associate Education Minister Craig Foss, whose responsibilities include the beleaguered Novopay system. Labour’s Chris Hipkins had set down a question for Education Minister Hekia Parata, designed to prod her on how she viewed Mr Foss’s handling of the teachers’ payroll changeover.
It was the sort of ambush Opposition MPs relish. If she said she had confidence in him, she would look foolish, as the system’s debut had been a debacle. If she avoided endorsing Mr Foss, he would look bad.
But, by chance, Mrs Parata was away, and the Government had chosen as her stand-in to answer the question . . . Mr Foss.
And funnily enough, he said he had full confidence in himself.