Mum’s pain over grave vandalism

Who in their right mind would desecrate someone’s grave with obscenities?

It’s a question Susanah Berry has had to ask herself twice in the two years that her son has been buried at Hastings’ Mangaroa cemetery.

Her son, Dene Riddell, took his life in August 2016. Berry knew Dene was sure of two things; he wanted to be buried at Mangaroa, where several of his mates lay, and he wanted to donate his organs.

Both occurred. But while the organ donation resulted in seven people getting a new lease of life, his burial has been beset with vandalism that has left Berry crying as much as the day she lost her son.

The first incident occurred shortly after Dene’s headstone was unveiled on August 12 last year. The headstone had been purchased through donations made on a Givealittle page.

‘‘One of his friends had carved a bench seat that was put near the grave. The day after the unveiling we discovered someone had carved, in large letters, an obscenity in it,’’ Berry said.

‘‘The guy who carved it was so disgusted by that that he removed it,’’ she said.

The latest vandalism occurred just last weekend. ‘‘Someone has painted ‘f*** you c***’ in the grass above the grave. I found that extremely traumatising. I had a meltdown. I felt just as I had when I heard he had died. It’s like living through it twice.’’

Berry said she had her suspicions as to who had carried out the vandalism.

She would like to see Hastings District Council do more to protect the graves at the cemetery.

‘‘There’s absolutely no security out there, and very little lighting. We pay a good price to purchase a plot to bury our loved ones, thinking they’ll be safe and cared for but it’s not.’’

A council spokeswoman said it was ‘‘very rare that we get damage that focuses on one gravesite’’. The cemetery manager had been in touch with Berry.

‘‘Cemeteries, by and large, are very isolated. While some cemetery gates can be locked to keep vehicles out, it is impossible to keep pedestrians out – regardless of their intentions. They are also very dark at night, which means cameras would be of little use.’’