Sex and schools: Why we must do better
A Family Planning survey says most young people are not getting much out of their sex education. Where are we going wrong, and what can we improve? Felix Desmarais reports.
Everyone has their story. There’s the VHS that teachers used to wheel out with the boy who gets an erection on the diving board. Condoms rolled down over a wooden phallus after the banana got too bruised. Tampons sailing around the classroom like cotton slingshots. Stilted sermons from pearl-clutching puritans.
Talking about the birds and the bees is still a difficult conversation to have.
On Monday, Family Planning released a survey report based on just over 1100 young people’s experiences of sex education.
While most (88 per cent) said they had received some ‘‘relationship and sexuality education’’ in school, a big proportion of respondents (38 per cent) found, at best, only some of it useful. Ten per cent found none of it useful, while 11 per cent found it very useful.
The survey, conducted in October last year, also found that the depth and breadth of topics was variable, with hot-ticket topics like consent, pornography and LGBTQIA+ issues receiving less classroom time than is recommended under Ministry of Education guidelines.
STATUS QUO
Sex education has been a requirement for years 1-10 (that’s 5-year-olds to 15-year-olds) in New Zealand schools since 1999.
Year 1 students were likely to learn about ‘‘friendships, families and respect’’.
By the end of year 10, most students will have been exposed to a programme that included ‘‘puberty and body development’’, and aspects of sexual and reproductive health, and which could include topics such as contraception and abortion.
Boards of trustees are required to consult their communities every two years on the content of the programme.
Parents/caregivers can request their child’s exclusion from ‘‘any particular element of sexuality education’’.
IS IT EFFECTIVE?
The perspectives of students from the Family Planning survey are consistent with reviews in 2007 and 2018 from the Education Review Office (ERO) and a report on youth and pornography from the Office of Film and Literature Classification (OFLC).
The 2018 ERO review found that not much had changed since 2007: schools were ‘‘not effectively meeting the needs of students’’, in particular Ma¯ ori, Pasifika, international and LGBTQIA+ students, as well as those with strong cultural/ religious beliefs and students with additional learning needs.
Curriculum coverage was not consistent, and some schools were not meeting the minimum standards.
Most did cover the minimum, but still had ‘‘significant gaps’’ , and while biological aspects of sexuality and puberty were often covered, there was a need for ‘‘more in-depth coverage’’ of topics such as consent, digital technologies and relationships.
Sexual violence and porn were covered in fewer than half of the high schools reviewed.
Then on Monday, Family Planning released its survey report, echoing these concerns, this time from students.
Family Planning chief executive Jackie Edmond acknowledges the limitations of the survey, which was heavily weighted towards women’s experiences, at 83 per cent of the makeup of the respondents.
This was in part due to the makeup of Family Planning’s clientele, but she believes it could also be indicative of the level of responsibility women and girls feel around sexual and relationship health, compared to boys and men. Notably, girls who found none of their sexuality education useful outweighed boys by 10 to one.
‘‘This is what young people want. They want to learn about these things, they’re hungry for more information.
‘‘So let’s support that, and support teachers to be comfortable to do that.’’
The Family Planning stance is that teachers, given enough professional development in the area, are the best people to deliver sexuality education, but others disagree.
Sexual Abuse Prevention Network (SAPN) general manager Fiona McNamara says resourcing is an issue for teachers’ professional development, but also for groups such as SAPN that provide specific expertise.
‘‘When we go into schools we’re doing a lot more than just standing in front of the classroom. We’re providing support for things like [sexual abuse] disclosures and advice for the school as an organisation. We will fill those gaps.’’
SAPN is funded by ACC to deliver programmes in schools, up to five lessons with each class in a year group, but other services are funded from donations.
McNamara would like to see sexuality education compulsory in all schools. ‘‘It should be compulsory for all schools to teach all aspects of sexuality and relationships education, and we’ve heard that consistently from young people.
‘‘Whenever we go into girls’ schools, the girls ask, are you teaching consent to the boys? They’re really worried about it.’’
She says the board of trustees community consultation part of the process could be removed, while parents or caregivers could still opt out on behalf of individual students.
It is important to be having conversations about sex, sexuality and consent, she says. ‘‘I was concerned to see only 53 per cent talk about consent. [Consent] is important in all relationships even if they’re not sexual.
‘‘What this report shows is that sexuality education across schools is inconsistent, and I think it’s important we work towards making it consistent.’’
Whether students from 16 and up might be able to decide for themselves is a ‘‘really good question to ask’’.
‘‘It is the age of consent. I think that is a conversation that could be had, and I would be keen to hear what 16-year-olds think about that.’’
Another finding of the Family Planning survey was that many students were seeking information online to fill the gaps in sex ed. That could be anything from searches and social media to hardcore pornography.
Jo Robertson is the training and research lead with The Light Project, a charitable trust led by a small team of sexual and public health experts, aimed at helping youth, their families, schools and communities ‘‘navigate the new porn landscape’’.
She was also a sex therapist and a school sexuality educator.
She says a 2010 study revealed that most porn on the internet is ‘‘sexually aggressive’’ and perpetuated oppressive gender roles for men and women.
‘‘You’re not talking about a really nice love-making scene, you’re talking about ‘gonzo’ porn – which is quite aggressive, it has no plot, there isn’t very much consent, there’s barely any condom use, there’s manipulation, there’s coercion.’’
Given brain development does not settle until age 25, the high risk-taking behaviour of teenagers and the fact they have no ‘‘real life reference point’’, exposure to this could be very
harmful, Robertson says.
‘‘With teenagers, they’re often seeing porn before they even kiss someone. That significantly impacts your ideas around sex.’’
The role of young people’s families is often left out of the conversation around sex education. ‘‘They shouldn’t be left out. When we think about solutions, we leave out this whole relationship.
‘‘I want parents to feel more comfortable talking to their kids. Let’s at least encourage families.’’
Upskilling teachers is important, but there’s no silver bullet. ‘‘It’s multi-layered. Teachers already have a lot on their plate.’’
Associate Education Minister Tracey Martin says the findings of the Family Planning survey ‘‘to some extent’’ reflect what the ERO has already said.
‘‘Some schools do it well, but a minority don’t, so we have to do better. That has been the situation for at least the last 10 years.
‘‘But with young people telling us they go online if they don’t learn in the classroom, it means the quality of relationship and sexuality education in schools is really important.’’
It may also be a signal to parents to ‘‘get more involved’’. ‘‘These can be awkward conversations, but they really need to happen.’’
She confirms she has asked the ministry to ‘‘review and update’’ its information and improve access and knowledge about existing resources, and wants to announce the outcome of the work within the ‘‘next two months’’.