The 5 shopping habits holding you back
Do you shop a lot but never have anything to wear? Most of us have a lot of clothing, but the average woman wears 20 per cent of her clothes 80 per cent of the time.
Some of this is down to our shopping habits and the messages we receive from society (and give ourselves) about our appearance, or about the way we “should” show up in the world.
Shopping should be about having fun, creativity and finding pieces that allow you to wear your personality.
Years of working as a stylist, helping women to reclaim shopping as something joyful has led me to identify five key types of shopping self-sabotage.
Do any of these describe you or someone you know?
THE DEFEATED
So many of us have body issues that have been forced on us by society, which can make shopping challenging. Have you ever cried in a fitting room? I have. The defeated shopper can suffer from negative self-talk. “I can’t wear styles like that, I’m too old for this. I’ll never find anything there.” Or the age old cry, “I’ll buy it when I’ve lost 5kg.”
If you are going shopping, you owe it to yourself to get dressed up and shop for the body you have today.
Being body confident is not easy, and when stores don’t make clothes in enough sizes, it is easy to feel defeated. Make sure you shop in places where you know the clothes will fit you, and go with a trusted friend who can run back and forth for you so you don’t end up exhausted.
Try to recognise that negative self-talk so you can learn to silence it to be the style maven you are. Follow people on social media who have bodies like yours, and find out where they shop. And have lots of snack breaks and keep hydrated, because no-one shops well when hungry.
THE COMMITMENT-PHOBE
The commitment-phobe tries on everything and buys nothing. They have trouble deciding what feels good on them and what they really like. They keep to the same types of clothes because they are not sure what else to buy, or their wardrobe is full of clothes they may not even fit or like any more.
If you’re a commitment-phobe, you first need to make a list of what you need. What are you always missing when you reach into your wardrobe? You are not the person you were 10 years ago, and you don’t need to dress like them.
Your body has changed and that’s OK. In fact, it’s totally normal. You also need a trusted friend – or a stylist – to help you recognise when something puts a big smile on your face in the changing room so you can smile more often.
Setting yourself up for shopping success takes a positive attitude, a clear block of time (don’t shop in a rush), and being prepared to take a risk or two.
It also helps if you shop in places where you know you have a chance of finding something. Make sure you are shopping in stores that are inside your budget and stock your size.
Don’t be afraid to ask people whose style you admire where they shop, or stop someone on the street to tell them they look fabulous and drop in a “where did you get that?”
Don’t take shopping too seriously, play dress up for the hell of it, and have fun.
If you’re really in a shopping rut don’t be afraid to consult a stylist. That’s what we’re here for.
THE BARGAIN HUNTER
This was me in my early-20s: “Woohoo I have $80, I am off to buy four new tops!”
Just because it’s cheap, doesn’t make it a bargain. Add up all those sets of $20 and $30 and you could have gone out and bought one or two stunning pieces that fit you like a glove. Those are the pieces that make it fun to get dressed in the morning, not the piles and piles of cotton singlets that were so cheap you couldn’t say no – and that still have the tags on.
I love a bargain too, but try to think about price per wear when choosing a new garment. In the long run, it’s better for the environment and your wallet.
THE SIZE-IST
My wardrobe contains sizes 12 to 20, hand on heart. I don’t know anyone who is consistently one size in every store. The size-ist won’t try something on unless it is within the size range they deem acceptable.
“I’m a size 16, this is so small fitting – nope, I’m not going up a size!”
As an in-betweenie – someone who doesn’t fall perfectly into “straight” or plus sizes – I have been guilty of this in the past, clinging to being a 16 because I was afraid to try a plus size range.
Now that I have let that go I realise I can have the best of both worlds – lucky me.
If you find a top you love and it is three sizes bigger than you normally wear but the fit is great, buy it. No-one cares what it says on the label. Fit is key.
THE COMFORT SHOPPER
Comfort shoppers frequent the same few stores whenever they have to go shopping and end up buying the same items over and over again.
It becomes a uniform – confess, how many stripy tees do you own? (My number is five).
They are often scared to shop online and think it’s too hard to trawl different shops to try to find something they like.
I can totally understand this one. When fit is your primary concern, taking a risk by shopping somewhere new can be a bit daunting, as can shopping online.
But there are so many options and amazing labels available to us at the click of a button. Take a risk, order a few things and try them out in the comfort of your own home and watch those shopping horizons broaden.
Try somewhere no fuss like The Iconic where you can return your items for free if they aren’t what you fancy.