‘Bittersweet’ memorial for Baxtor
‘‘I don’t feel like it’s depressing. I term this as a public holiday for me and my family because it’s our memorial day for my son.’’
Mum Breanna Gowland
Baxtor Gowland would have been eight today, but never had the chance to grow up.
He was second-youngest of the
185 victims who died in the Christchurch earthquake on February 22,
2011.
Baxtor’s mother Breanna Gowland said the eighth memorial service yesterday was ‘‘more positive than anything’’.
‘‘I don’t feel like it’s depressing. I term this as a public holiday for me and my family because it’s our memorial day for my son,’’ she said.
Hers, and many other families, gathered at the city’s memorial wall to remember their loved ones lost.
Baxtor was born just 13 days after the first Canterbury earthquake on September 4, 2010.
He was struck by falling bricks when the quake hit while he slept by the fireplace at his St Albans home.
He died later that day in his mother’s arms at Christchurch Hospital.
Baxtor was the surviving boy of the twins his mother had been carrying.
The memorial had become a tradition for the family, Breanna Gowland said.
Daughters Anahera, 6, Tessa, 5, and Britta, 1, wanted to participate this year, and drew pictures of themselves and Baxtor.
‘‘As the girls get older, it’s sort of become a family tradition. It’s a way for them to remember their brother and include him. It’s bittersweet, but it’s become quite a nice thing to do as a family.’’
Son Lennox, now four and a half months old, is nearly the same age as Baxtor when he died.
‘‘So there’s a lot of reminders there, a lot of feeling, there’s a lot of memories that are coming up. It’s been rough but healing.’’
But the family remembered Baxtor in every kind of way, Breanna Gowland said.
‘‘We donate toys to the hospital, we celebrate his birthday every year, we have a cake for him every year.
‘‘It’s just become a tradition, these are the sort of things that help you mentally get over a loved one. You keep them in your heart and move on that way. He’s in all of my children.’’
About 500 people attended the memorial service across the Avon River from the Canterbury Earthquake National Memorial.
Christchurch Mayor Lianne Dalziel said the city had formed a bond that would never be broken.
‘‘Today’s theme is caring for each other. It seems so appropriate when the experience of the earthquake alongside the tragic loss of life, traumatic injury and loss of homes was this extraordinary sense of coming together. ‘‘And so it is that eight years on from that fateful day we come together at this time and this place to remember, to share our pain and sorrows, to record our gratitude for those who came to our aid and to care for each other once more.’’
Two poems were read by family members of the victims – Remember Me by Margaret Mead was read by Julie Hibbs, who lost her mother Heather Meadows after the CTV building fell.
I Find Hope by Tanya Lord was read by Vanessa McGregor who lost her grandfather, Barry Craig, after he perished in the PGC building.