English woes worse than our pitches

The relentless English attacks on New Zealand cricket pitches reeks of a thinly disguised excuse for their own shortcomings in the just completed test series.

We’ve heard it from respected outfits like ESPN Cricinfo, The Times and The Telegraph; we’ve heard it from respected figures like Mike Atherton.

Basically they tell us our pitches suck and that we are guilty of quickening the seemingly inevitable death of test cricket.

Thankfully we haven’t heard it as loudly from the English team themselves. They probably know better as they pack their bags and head home with another test series in New Zealand lost.

There were two teams playing on the same pitches and one of them got outplayed for most of the time.

It’s hard to blame a pitch when there’s an innings and 65 run defeat to own up to. New Zealand managed to score 615-9 and England were dismissed for 353 and 197 at Bay Oval.

On a supposedly placid pitch, England’s batsmen failed miserably.

At Seddon Park in Hamilton, England were again their own worst enemies, this time with their selection and their stupid decision to omit a spinner on a pitch that has been the breeding ground for the likes of Daniel Vettori and Mitchell Santner.

And where was their pace bowler with a heart as big as Neil Wagner’s?

These two shortcomings contributed more than anything to their inability to dismiss New Zealand twice when their skipper Joe Root had put them into a position of strength with his superb double century.

This wasn’t a great England test side to start with and therein lies the real base for their problems on this tour.

While Atherton and the Telegraph’s respected Scyld Berry delivered damnation on New Zealand pitches they did acknowledge the level of this English team.

Atherton admitted there were ‘‘just three players of decent test experience – Root, [Stuart] Broad and [Ben] Stokes – and perhaps it was too much to expect success against arguably New Zealand’s best-ever test team’’.

That puts a better perspective on things than simply blaming conditions.

And wasn’t it great to see test cricket go into a fifth day, rather than these quick-fire contests that are threatening to see the longest version of the game shortened? Test cricket should be a war of attrition and one where a draw can be as honourable as a win at times.

The beauty of cricket is its ability to throw up different conditions in different countries. It’s not a sport where you put up goalposts, paint the lines and the field is basically the same whatever continent you are on.

Coping with different conditions is a key ‘‘test’’ in test cricket. Countries everywhere utilise their home environments to maximise their chances of success. It’s been part of the game since the first touring team stepped on to a boat all those years ago.

What was in store in terms of pitches, grounds and weather was almost as big a challenge as the players in front of you.

To bring a homogenised approach to the test game with uniformity in pitches would remove an element of intrigue.

Cricket might as well designate all tests to a drop-in pitch somewhere in the Middle East and make it a made-for-TV product where conditions are equal for everyone.

For some English, that would be more palatable than standing in front of a mirror right now and admitting they just got outplayed.