If I ruled the world, we would be in super clover

This will be psychologically difficult as the scientists come to terms with the fact that their job now is not to make money or promote the institution but to use their scientific skills to serve the public good. Special medication may be needed.

Fred Dagg, alias John Clarke, butchered the words of many a good song. The one I frequently recall starts, ‘‘If I ruled the world certain people would have to jack up their ideas.’’ I want to put myself into that role – I wonder, if I ruled the world of agricultural research what would I make as my numero uno priority?

I would build on the foundation rock of our agricultural competitive advantage – our clover-based pastoral system. This biological factory should be modernised to meet our future needs. Can we?

Clover is a marvellous plant, but it was born with genetic deficiencies. It has a frail and shallow rooting system making it drought-prone and requiring higher soil nutrient levels. Red clover is tap-rooted but hates being grazed. Ryegrass has a fibrous deeper-rooting system but it does not fix nitrogen.

Can’t we get these cousins to have sex? If they could what would their babies look like?

These are not idle ideas now that we have this rapidly developing technology called biotechnology.

Yes, that is what I’m endorsing. Those people who oppose gene technology will need to ‘‘jack up their ideas’’.

I accept that new technology can make folk fearful but like those irrational childish fears of ghosts and goblins, fear evaporates when confronted with the truth.

I love to remind people that the first steam engines provoked great concern. Surely the human body would fall apart if it went faster than a horse? The snorting monster would frighten humans and animals to death? The solution to these fears was a man with a red flag running ahead in warning.

So let’s use our mighty human intellect and apply all our clever knowledge and technologies for the benefit of all. Let’s play god and make a super clover.

It will be tap-rooted with a fibrous root system. We will increase its photosynthetic efficiency by making it more upright so that ryegrass does not shade it out. We will tweak its ability to fix nitrogen (N) from the air – we want more N per kilogram of dry-matter. And while we are dissecting its genome we might as well enhance those properties that make it a superior ruminant feed and get rid of those chemicals it produces that cause bloat.

To do this I would gather all the gene jockeys, biochemists, agronomists, soil scientists, biometricians and other assorted clever people together under one research banner: Super clover.

I would tell them: Here is the goal, here are the research dollars, here is the raw material, here are the facilities – don’t call home till you are finished.

Major changes in our science organisation will be required. Out with competition, profits, dividends, bidding and begging for funds. Lots of people, especially in Wellington, would have to ‘‘jack up their ideas’’.

Some asset stripping is required to recover the bodies and minds of the scientists trapped in the current managerial and fiscally engorged science administrative system.

This process, phase one, is to be known internally as ‘‘releasing the prisoners’’. Once released, the prisoners will be allowed to reinhabit their organisations with their bulk funding plus the large loads of loot previously consumed by those now redundant managers with their inflated salaries, perks and advertising budgets.

The phase two mantra will be ‘‘science for science’s sake’’. This will be psychologically difficult as the scientists come to terms with the fact that their job now is not to make money or promote the institution but to use their scientific skills to serve the public good. Special medication may be needed.

I envisage it will take the scientists about one micro-second to understand the need for such deep reforms. And they will, with delighted sighs, embrace ‘‘super clover’’.

They will ‘‘dig’’ being ‘‘ on the team’’ to produce a super forage plant that is drought-tolerant, reduces the need for fertiliser N, reduces the requirement to operate our soils at such high soil fertility levels, reduces the potential of runoff of phosphorus and leaching of N, that makes lambs grow plump quickly, and doesn’t give Daisy the cow a bellyache. And at the same time fixes free nitrogen from the air – lots of it.

Down sides? It could annoy the green movement, who are opposed to GM, but ironically want clean water. Perhaps we could use some of the saved research dollars to buy them little red flags?

Dr Doug Edmeades is managing director of agKnowledge and was Federated Farmers’ Agriculture Personality of the Year in 2012.