THIS MUCH I KNOW

Delaney Ruston

What shocks me in life is how much time children and teens are spending on screens — the average time for 8-18-year-olds in the United States per day is 6.5 hours, and that doesn’t include any time spent on screens for homework or at school. Statistics show that in America 30 per cent of families have fights every single day over the use of screens. It’s very worrisome and an issue that needs to be addressed.

What shocked me in making Screenagers, was when we met a 19-year-old named Andrew who became absolutely consumed with the internet and gaming. He was a straight-A student in high school in spite of heavy gaming. His parents thought he was just “blowing off steam” after school each day. At college the gaming got so bad that he was up all night and flunked all his classes. We see what happens when he goes to a video game addiction rehabilitation centre. His story really opened my mind to the devastation that excessive screen time can lead to.

In my high school years, I lived with my mum in Berkeley California. Her biggest concern was around my going out at night with my friends. Of course, she was always concerned not knowing what were we doing. It is interesting in the US that teens are not going out quite as much with friends — there is more time at home using social media on a Friday night.

Bill Gates recently said that he didn’t give his kids smartphones until the age of 14, despite their constant complaining. I think it’s hard to set an exact age, but for a smartphone if parents can stomach the begging, waiting to 13-14 is my advice. No matter what age a mobile personal device is given to a kid there needs to be clear guidelines of when it can be used. The data shows that heavier users of technology have an increased risk of problems wit attention development, being able to self-sooth and being comfortable in social situations.

I hope that in 30 years’ time my children would say that I parented with integrity — setting fair boundaries and sticking to them, and that I taught them to live by a set of good values. I also hope that they would say that I wholeheartedly listened to their opinions and emotional needs and that I lovingly responded to them.

The most persistent criticism

of my parenting is I am overly pushy at times. Take family movie night. When they were young I prided myself of raising them on fantastic documentaries. As they hit the teen years I have still pushed for documentaries — I don’t always get my way — but I do push pretty darn hard.

I read paper books and e-readers. My whole family uses both.

My advice is if you want to use an e-reader, don’t get one that connects to the internet, as that adds such a distraction and can lead to just playing games or watching videos instead of reading.

I think there are five core things people should have in their life. Physical activity, meaningful work (whether in their job or personal life), relationships with others, an environmental connection, and community engagement. I strive all the time to have a healthy balance of all five.

DELANEY RUSTON’S FILM SCREENAGERS WILL SHOW AT THE DOC EDGE INTERNATIONAL FILM FESTIVAL FROM MAY 10-21 IN WELLINGTON, AND MAY 24-JUNE 5 IN AUCKLAND. FOR MORE INFO, SEE DOCEDGE.NZ