Penny Ashton talks to Celeste Barber about becoming an Instagram success
Look out, Insta-poseurs, Celeste Barber is coming for you, writes Penny Ashton
Awoman stares vacantly at the camera, her butt cheeks clad in wide fishnets, her blouse tucked into “sexy“grannypants, her hair tousled and her strappy, studded heels perched ... on a Stairmaster. On her left is Mariah Carey posing in much the same way, but clearly attempting to convince us this is just another fabulous day in her #celebritylife.
But Celeste Barber is having none of it. In fact, it’s what she might call a #bagofdicks.
Welcome to the world of Instagram superstar Celeste Barber. You might not know her name, but you’ve probably seen one of her #celestechallengeaccepted parodies, where she skewers ridiculous images of celebrities by hilariously recreating them. From Kim Kardashian on a pile of dirt to Hailey Baldwin (daughter of Stephen, pasher of Bieber) chatting on a pay phone on a toilet; to a topless Amber Rose seductively tonguing a boxing glove; they are all ripe for a Celestial plucking.
And Barber is blowing up. The mother of four has amassed 4.7 million followers on Instagram in just three years. That’s the population of New Zealand hanging on her every absurd post where, as she says; “no bitch is safe”. And of course, as with most viral sensations, none of this was planned.
But don’t call her a housewife from New South Wales who got lucky, because before life as a “click bae”, Barber was already a respected actress and comedian. She told magazine MamaMia in 2017: “It annoys me to be described as a mum from Central Coast who’s struck overnight success. I’ve trained as an actor, I’ve worked in TV for years, done stand-up. I’m a writer. I have a bit of a bee in my bonnet about people thinking this is just my hobby.”
So to set the record straight, Barber has written her first book, Challenge Accepted: 253 Steps To Becoming an Anti-It Girl. As a comedian and actor myself, I was keen to get the gossip on all things Insta, celeb and her newest snogging buddy; fashionista Tom Ford. “Oh God I am so sick of myself,” she laughs, “I am sick of talking about myself, writing about myself, taking pictures of myself … but I have wanted to
write a book for some time, though it wasn’t until HarperCollins approached me that it felt right.”
Another deciding factor was “a shit-tonne of money. I have a million kids.” The process of writing though, did not run smooth; “It was hard revisiting some of the traumas in my life, but it was cathartic. I liken the process to childbirth, as I was writing I thought ‘I will DIE HERE, this will never end’ then once it was over I thought, ‘Hey, I think I can do that all again.”’
The book is an unflinching, no-holds-barred, sweary account of her 36 years. If you are a delicate flower, I suggest you f*** off now. The first chapter has the line: “Here is the story about the day I met my first son and how my once-neat vagina became one big hole.” It’s raw, funny and authentic and each chapter details an aspect of the creation of brand Barber, even if that’s a notion she dislikes.
“I have always just been honest, I get it out there. I hate the word brand. It’s really weird when people say, ‘Oh but that’s your brand’ when really my brand is just being me.”
The memoir details various triumphs and struggles including dyslexia, drama school dramas, school bullies, #metoo encounters and marrying her #hothusband. It recounts a journey that led her to realise, “I was a little different, and different is interesting. Different is the tits!” Barber also exposes her heart, literally; with poignant stories of loss from cancer and suicide and also from having emergency open heart surgery at 25. Her brutal account of cracking open her ribs is not, ironically, for the fainthearted, but it is balls out and bang on brand.
A fierce love of her family shines through and their support and acceptance has also clearly been “the tits”. After Prince Harry, her sister Olivia is Barber’s favourite person and it is her we can thank for helping launch #celestechallengeaccepted. The sisters used to exchange ridiculous pics imitating celebrities for a laugh, and then Barber decided to post them on her previously bog-standard Instagram page.
In January 2015 she posted a pic of her attempting a yoga pose next to a model casually folded in half, captioned: “I’m starting something.” And holy smoke she was right. Within a week she’d gained 2000 followers. Suddenly the ABC wanted to interview her and she was up to 5000 followers.
Then the Daily Mail butchered the ABC story and posted it on their homepage. Her followers jumped tens of thousands a minute. Despite being conflicted because “the Daily Mail is awful” she suffered for her art, and overnight went from 5000 to 50,000 followers.
Since then her juggernaut has only gathered pace, going from 1.8 million followers a mere 15 months ago, to nearly 5 million today. Her star is rocketing, fuelled by her work ethic and her comic chops. Numerous copycats have sprung up but it’s Barber’s attention to detail, her eye for the parody, her down to earthiness and witty, blunt captioning that her fans love best.
And #OMG do they. A quick perusal of her comments astoundingly yields mainly positivity, though Barber wouldn’t know it. After being told “you’re fat, f*** off” one too many times near the start of this journey, she has made a policy to no longer engage.
Barber met her #hothusband, aka Apihana Robin, 21 years ago and knew immediately he was the one. This “Maori Adonis”(whose father, Paruru, is from just outside of Gisborne and is of Ngati Porou descent) has become a quiet star of Barber’s Instagram. He supports her by posing with his shirt off wherever possible, sucking her tongue and taking thousands of photos. Their two kids, Buddy and Lou, feature from time to time but Barber is wary of exposing her family, saying: “This is my job, they didn’t ask for it.”
Which brings us back to money. Barber has posted more than 900 Instagram pics but has only been paid for 15. She considers herself an anti-influencer but is also pragmatic: “I’ll do it but only for products I believe in. I won’t partner with any brand that makes women feel bad about themselves. I’m sick of the life-shaming and I will only work with people who ask me: ‘How do you want to do it, what’s your vision for this?”’
Her recent videos with new BFF Tom Ford at New York Fashion Week illustrate this. In them Barber is duct-taped into his clothing, models fiercely and pashes Ford’s face leaving him covered in lipstick. “I am in love with Tom Ford,” she enthuses, “He knows exactly what he’s doing and he gave me complete creative freedom.”
Promoting a fashion brand with stick-thin models may seem to go against what she’s known for but it’s the anti-life-shaming that is at the core of #challengeaccepted. “I have always loved editorial high fashion,” she explains. “It’s almost art. What I am sick of is celebrities selling images on Instagram of an attainable life that is simply not attainable.” Aka, no one wakes up in full makeup, slithers out of bed undies first to go walk a dog topless, tweeting #serenity. #bitchplease.
Above all else though, Barber just wants to make people laugh. People often congratulate her promotion of body positivity and embracing unflattering angles, but all of this came from her looking at a picture and thinking, “Is it funny?” She is very happy to be a feminist role model encouraging people to love their bodies but says it was accidental.
“I am, however, 100 per cent comfortable with how I look,” she explains. “I exercise, I eat well — but that’s about being healthy. I’ve had too many people die around me to not evolve. It’s disrespectful to them for me to care if I fit into a size 10.”
So how long can she maintain #challenge accepted? “I have no idea,” she laughs, “I am starting to get comedy work and am stoked about that, I’m still f***ing going so I’ll keep riding it.” And that has always been Barber’s ultimate goal — to get work as a comic.
She still finds it hard getting auditions in Australia, what with full-on ladies often being kryptonite to TV execs, though her role in the recent Netflix hit The Letdown was a highlight; but her recent trips to the United States have delivered some LA-based managers, one of which being the former husband of Mrs Prince Harry, and some opportunities.
She is about to begin her second live comedy tour of the US (with her first selling out in 24 hours) and is excited about the prospect of her own TV show. “I want to do something like Girls or Broad
City, and I can’t say anything now, but that’s looking GREAT!”
Finally, as someone in the industry I know the relentless feeling of pushing shit uphill in an effort to “make it”, so wondered if she felt she had now? No chance. “I don’t think I will think I have ‘made it’,” she says, “I’m a hustler, I LOVE working and all the creative freedom that comes with it. I want to keep working, keep creating work and kissing Tom Ford.”
#blessed.
What I am sick of is celebrities selling images on Instagram of an attainable life that is simply not attainable. Celeste Barber